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Catalogue for Previous Weeks - F.A.Q
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This article is far too long to fit within the thread word limit, so it's going to be continued in a child comment which I'll link when it gets there. Furthermore, I've elected to name a few pokemons who technically have niches but too fringe to expand more on. Some of them can be found in previous weeks if appropriate.
RBY
Rhydon and Golem are the most prominent Ground types in the tier, the former with significant more usage stats in the modern metagame. Their shared Rock Ground typing hardwalls Zapdos and, to a much less prominent degree, Jolteon and Moltres. They’re also both countered by Exeggutor, as well as weak to the very popular Blizzard slamming them on their pitiful special bulk.
Rhydon is the significantly more popular of the two. It boasts better bulk, though not to a significant degree. More crucially, it has a 130 base Atk that allows its Earthquake to 2HKO Chansey, 3HKO Slowbro (sometimes), and 3HKO Snorlax. As it threatens these slower bulky mons, it can use many opportunities to set up a Substitute. Rhydon is the only viable user of the move this generation, seeing as it doesn’t block status in gen 1, but Rhydon was already immune to Thunder Wave. It needs to watch out for Sleep Powder & Stun Spore from Exeggutor, however. STAB Rock Slide helps it chase out the fliers which it walls, and the last move slot is reserved for Body Slam, whose only real use is to threaten Paralysis on Starmie or Exeggutor’s switching in. Rhydon can be an incredibly dangerous threat given some Paralysis support, and being immune to Thunder Wave itself is a great characteristic to have.
Golem’s advantages over Rhydon are: speed (which outspeeds nothing more than opposing Rhydons) and Explosion. Its Earthquake misses on very important benchmarks, and therefore it leverages its Explosion, the 2nd strongest move in the game behind Snorlax’s Self-Destruct, to wallbreak for its teammates. While Rhydon can be a late-game sweeper, Golem instead darts in and out of battle to scout for the perfect Explosion timing. OHKO-ing an opposing Tauros can be game-breaking, but it has to be very careful of Gengar or opposing Rock Grounds absorbing it.
Not mentioned: Sandslash
GSC
The ground typing becomes even more prominent in this generation. As Blizzard has been largely phased out, along with the legendary Electrics being on every single team spamming Thunder, every notable Ground types can act as a switch to them.
Nidoking is an excellent offensive threat in the GSC metagame. Aside from STAB EQ, it also learns the famed Ice Beam Thunder(bolt) coverage that allows it to punish many EQ switchins like Zapdos, Skarmory, or Cloyster. While its power without super effective coverage isn’t amazing, only boasting 92/85/85 offensive stats, the move that truly pushes it into great territory is Lovely Kiss. GSC Sleep isn’t as terrible as RBY Sleep, but it’s nevertheless a huge momentum swing. Nidoking therefore can take advantage of this to fire off strong attacks to eventually break through its usual checks given the right opportunity, something no other mixed sweepers can do. If desired, it can also run Thief to steal enemy checks’ Leftovers at the cost of a moveslot.
Steelix is the new evolution of the worthless Onyx, with excellent physical bulk and an auspicious Steel Ground typing. This makes it not weak against the common Hidden Power Ice which the legendary Electrics run, and acts as a near surefire counter to them unless they carry the rarer HP Water. Its base Atk is a pitiful 85, however, and therefore it relies more on Explosion like RBY’s Golem to break walls, but also carry Roar to act as a phaser against things like Mono-lax, Raikou, or Perish Trap Misdreavus. This shuffling also allows its team to rack up more Spikes damage. The last move is often Curse, which allows it to create some offensive pressure with a boost or two, and then abuse Roar even further.
Golem returns with renewed vigor. Having learnt Rapid Spin in a Spike-ridden metagame, Golem found itself as one of the better role compression mons that acts as an Electric check, Rapid Spinner, phaser, and Snorlax check all in one. It still never enters a battle without Explosion, and its poor special bulk means that it must scout enemy Hidden Power lest it becomes a free kill. Nevertheless, Rapid Spin is such an important utility that it sees consistent usage on many teams, so much so that the rare Hidden Power Water from Zapdos or Raikou are mostly aimed to remove it. Unlike other Spinners, Golem matches up poorly against the spiking Cloyster and Forretress, and requires offensive support elsewhere to make sure the hazards stay off.
Marowak boasts the strongest Earthquake in the game. While somewhat gimmicky, its Swords Dance set can give it the maximum 999, and with Spikes support can OHKO nearly the entire metagame at +2. However, this requires serious backup, as Marowak is otherwise painfully slow, frail, and cannot hold Leftovers. Furthermore, help against Skarmory is highly appreciated, as even with 999 Atk, a Rock Slide only 3HKOs the metal bird, who is immune to Spikes and can proceed to phaze Wak out. The 4th moveslot is usually either HP Bug to slam Exeggutor on the switch, or Rest to give it a second chance at sweeping. To get Marowak to work, some support with Agility Baton Pass from Jolteon, or Screens from Blissey is recommended, especially since the latter can Heal Bell off the sleep from Rest.
Rhydon has taken quite a fall in viability since the last generation. With weaknesses to many special attacks, Machamp, and Earthquakes, Rhydon finds itself hard-pressed to accomplish much. Unlike Golem, it provides no utility for the team aside from Roar, and the Snorlax-checking Steelix isn’t weak to Grass, ice, nor 4x weak to Water. Rhydon runs a Curse set to take advantage of its strong 130 Atk and natural physical bulk, as being slower in this generation means your Roar will go first. It cannot get past Skarmory, but can still provide some strong hits to break walls with.
Quagsire’s sole niche is a near fool-proof counter for the legendary Electrics, being immune to their Thunders and not weak to either HP Ice or Water. Its typing makes it a decent mixed wall, as not a lot of pokemons run Grass moves this generation, and can use the free turns its ok bulk generates to set up Belly Drum. EQ and HP Rock makes an ok attacking combo, and Rest can be used for longevity. If unable to set up, however, it’s defensively outclassed by the likes of Miltank or Raikou, and offensively outclassed by Marowak or Snorlax. One must build their team capable of taking advantage of this offensive defensive combination to justify using Quagsire.
Not mentioned: Piloswine, Sandslash, Donphan, Gligar, Nidoqueen
ADV
Zapdos continues to be a prominent threat, and the rise of Tyranitar, Aerodactyl, and general Rock Slide coverage gives Grounds even more viability. Lastly, an immunity to Sand in a tier where Tyranitar is king effectively boosts the longevity of all Ground pokemons, allowing them to actually gain health in Sand with Leftovers.
Swampert is the face of bulky waters in gen 3. It’s one of the most sturdy DD Tyranitar counters there are, resisting Rock unlike its Water-type brethren, and can also act as a catch-all check to many more prominent physical sweepers in the tier like Metagross, Aerodactyl, and DD Salamence. It’s so prominent that it basically forced many, many pokemon to run HP Grass just to have a chance to get past it. As a pokemon itself, however, Swampert can be as defensive or as offensive as one likes, possessing decent mixed offensive stats to complement its STAB EQ and Hydro Pump / Surf, while carrying Ice Beam for many Flying types, especially Salamence, and Grasses, like Celebi. It also has access to the great Focus Punch, which allows it to threaten Snorlax and Blissey while OHKO-ing max HP Tyranitar, something its Hydro Pump cannot do. Toxic, Roar, Protect, Refresh are all excellent moves for a more defensive variant. No matter what set it’s running, Swampert’s role in ADV OU cannot be understated, and is therefore one of the most common offensive / defensive threats of the metagame.
Dugtrio has gained Arena Trap this generation, and becomes one of the best revenge killers of the metagame. While it’s not very strong, the introduction of Choice Band gives it the power to achieve crucial KOs, and its amazing base 120 Spe means it can outrun basically any threat it encounters. The list of its victims is vast: Tyranitar, Metagross, Jirachi, Blissey, Celebi, opposing Dugtrio, Breloom, and many, many more. It’s undoubtedly a metagame defining threat, as something like Jolteon is considered superior to the legendary Raikou by many simply due to its Dugtrio-beating speed and access to Baton Pass to escape trapping. It’s also a very important team member of special offence, an almost required piece that exists solely to reliably remove Blissey, sometimes by the otherwise unseen Beat Up.
Claydol is the Rapid Spinning Ground type of ADV. Its unique Ground Psychic typing along with Levitate means it resists all of Ground, Fighting, Electric, and Rock, and is immune to Spikes and Dugtrio’s Arena Trap. All of this means that Claydol finds many opportunities to switch in and get off a spin against many common attacks like Rock Slide, EQ, Thunderbolt etc. It also possesses a STAB Psychic to threaten out the most common spinblocker of the tier: Gengar. Finally, Explosion gives it utility as a wallbreaker, especially if running Adamant to threaten out most of the Explosion-resistant pokemon with Earthquake. However, its support requires teammates’ help against Skarmory, as it can’t meaningfully threaten the metal bird, who often forces the issue with Drill Peck.
Flygon is last. Its Ground Dragon typing and Levitate means it’s also resistant to QuakeSlide and Spikes, while also not being weak to HP Bug from DD TTar or HP Grass aimed at a teammate’s Swampert. While its 100/80/100 offensive stats won’t be winning awards, STAB EQ and a myriad of offensive options almost guarantees it’ll find a target to hit, and its defensive profile is excellent for finding chances to enter the field. It can even run a more defensive Protect Toxic set that abuses its defensive capabilities to spread status and break down many teams late-game.
Not mentioned: Gligar, Steelix, Donphan, Marowak, Camerupt, Rhydon
DPP
Stealth Rocks (SR) was introduced in this generation and became the most influential move in the metagame. Coincidentally, Ground types get them.
Swampert returns once again as the premier bulky water. With Tyranitar as popular as ever with physical Pursuit, Superpower, and STAB Stone Edge, Swampert’s defensive capabilities are called into need once again. That said, the physical special split also gave it access to physical water STAB in Waterfall and special Ground STAB in Earth Power, along with extra Ice Punch and Superpower coverage for the physical side. The most popular sets feature SR in some way, to guarantee Pert value as either a lead or a role player, either with max Atk for more damage, or mixed defence to be more of a tank. In this capacity, physical coverage is far more popular. If even more offence is desired, a bulky Choice Band set that runs Stone Edge for Zapdos and Gyarados can do a bit of wallbreaking, or even Modest special set with Hydro Pump spamming. However, these more offensive options remain unpopular compared to the utility set.
Gliscor features an excellent Ground Flying typing that gives it only 2 weaknesses, a SR neutrality but a Spikes immunity, and resistant to the new Close Combat and Superpower. 75/125/75 defences make for an excellent physical defensive profile, and 95/95 offensive stats are surprisingly decent for a mon with such great bulk. Its Stallbreaker set is its most popular, running Taunt to shut down recovery attempts on walls while also preventing offensive mons from setting up on it, and Roost for reliable recovery. If some offensive power is needed, it can run a Swords Dance set to abuse its natural bulk to gain multiple boosts due to its incredible staying power. Its attacks usually consisted of the mandatory STAB EQ, Ice Fang for Flyings, Dragons, and the occasional grasses, and perhaps Thunder Fang for bulky waters or Wing Attack for Breloom. Taunt and SR also make Gliscor a decent lead, as it can U-Turn out to keep momentum.
Flygon appreciated the generational shift very much. It gained an excellent physical dragon STAB in Outrage, and U-Turn allows it to run a very effective Choice Scarf set to utilise its good speed and great neutral coverage in just Outrage and Earthquake. Its last slot on a Scarf set can therefore be very flexible, either Thunder Punch for Gyarados, Dragon Claw for more stable STAB, or Toxic to cripple a wall. The new Life Orb also synergises well with its mixed move pool, allowing it to drop powerful Draco Meteor while still running Earthquake and Fire Blast to crush the Steels that resist its Dragon STAB. Roost can be used on this set to offset Life Orb recoil and give Flygon more general longevity, but if Expert Belt is run instead, U-Turn is always an excellent option.
Nidoqueen, despite its NU placement, is an excellent OU Stall machine. Its claim to fame is the new Toxic Spikes, and on stall teams the Poison Ground typing provide resistant to Fighting and Rock, which couples with 90/87/85 mixed bulk to check the likes of Breloom, Lucario, and Tyranitar, especially since EQ as a coverage move is rarely ran, and Poison Point can punish a lot of the U-Turn spammers in the tier. A lack of recovery does hurt, and thus Nidoqueen prefers Protect to get as much recovery out of Black Sludge as possible. While Nidoqueen’s offences aren’t anything special, its vast movepool means that its moveset can be specifically tailored to cover the threats which the rest of its team does not.
Hippowdon is the alternate Sand setter of the tier. While most prefer Tyranitar’s offensive prowess, Hippo itself is a near sure-fire Tyranitar counter, boasting a titanic physical bulk of 108/118 that can sit on most of the physical threats of the metagame. It complements this by excellent recovery in Slack Off, and SR which allows Hippo to always get pressure out of the switch. Roar synergises with this even more, racking up damage on the pesky flying types or Levitate-rs that otherwise walls it. If a more direct option is preferred, Ice Fang can slam the Gliscor and Dragons. Still, since it relies on pure bulk more than resistances to wall physical threats, it’s usually very specially frail, and has a weakness against some physical threats in Gyarados and Breloom.
Mamoswine boasts a meaty 130 Atk stat, and a unique STAB combination of Ground and Ice. Its Ice Shard is an excellent priority move which knocks the life out of dangerous threats like Latias, Flygon, and Gliscor, its STAB EQ crushes most neutral targets, and for everything else, there’s Stone Edge. Life Orb is the most popular item, allowing it to switch moves and especially abuse Ice Shard to finish off faster threats should the opportunity arise. While Superpower is a fine 4th move to slam Steels not weak to EQ like Bronzong or Skarmory, and OHKO Blissey without a second thought, Stealth Rocks can be used here to exert some pressure as the opponent switches out. Choice Band is an alternative, but locking into any of those four moves can be exploited heavily. Focus Sash makes Mamo a decent SR lead as well. Despite all this, its typing gives it a lot of common weaknesses, and 80 speed isn’t nearly as good as it used to be.
Quagsire lived under Swampert’s shadow in gen 3, but access to reliable recovery in Recover as well as Encore to counter setup sweepers gave it a niche this generation. As Swampert’s more often than not opt for offence this generation, Quagsire is a fine defensive Water Ground type that walls Starmie (with Water Absorb), Metagross, or Tyranitar. Its moveset is very predictable, however, as after the prerequisite Earthquake, the last move is either Toxic for more residual damage or Ice Punch for Flygon or Dragonite. Quagsire is extremely predictable, and must be used with consideration.
Gastrodon is yet another Water Ground type. While it isn’t immune to Water, and therefore doesn’t counter Starmie or Gyarados, it has Sticky Hold which makes it immune to Trick from a lot of choice-d pokemons. Its sole unique role is therefore as a Curse sweeper that’s immune to Trick, who sports good mixed bulk and Recover for longevity. Waterfall + Earthquake a.l.a Swampert is good enough coverage, but it’ll struggle to beat the likes of Gyarados or Latias with such limited coverage.
Rhyperior is a fierce wallbreaker, as 140 base Atk is nothing to scoff at, and its attacking options ranging from STAB EQ + Stone Edge to coverage in Aqua Tail, Megahorn, or Fire Punch are all excellent options. However, it’s really, really slow, and therefore easily forced out with its double 4x weaknesses and poor special bulk, even with Solid Rock or Sandstorm SpD boost to soften them. Choice Band is by far the most powerful option, boasting the ability to 2HKOs everything in the metagame with the right coverage. However, it doesn’t have a lot of opportunities to fire off this power due to its speed and poor matchup against the bulky waters of DPP like Swampert or Milotic.
Donphan gained SR and Ice Shard this generation. It’s now a fairly respectable Rapid Spinner in the metagame with excellent physical bulk and priority. For the most part, it’s a fine support pokemon that aims to set up SR, takes a few physical hits, and threatens revenge kills against Dragons with Ice Shard. It’s a very one dimensional pokemon in this aspect, but its effectiveness as a Rapid Spinner is appreciated.
Not mentioned: Dugtrio (R.I.P), Steelix, Nidoking, Camerupt, Gastrodon
BW
Landorus-Therian is a name one should not fail to keep in mind. It has Gliscor’s auspicious typing, combined with an excellent ability in Intimidate, fearsome 145/105/91 mixed offensive stats, and a respectable 89/90/80 bulk if kept in mind its typing and ability. Lando-T is is one of the best pokemon of gen 5 OU, and is one of the best glues for any good non-rain team. Its Choice Scarf set is an excellent scout and revenge-killer, with a strong U-Turn to punish the like of Latios. Lando-T is in fact so common that it also runs HP Ice for the mirror matchup, despite it not hitting too many other relevant targets. Earthquake is its STAB move of choice, but any other move can be slotted in and out depending on sets. Stone Edge is a natural pairing on the Scarf set, but Superpower is a fine option to drop Skarmory, Ferrothorn, or Air Balloon Heatran. If an offensive pivot is desired, just drop the Scarf and speed for a bulky spread and either Leftovers or Rocky Helmet, and you have one of the best physical checks of the metagame against the dangerous Terrakion. Lastly, access to either Swords Dance, Rock Polish, or even both on the same set can turn Lando-T into a fearsome sweeper at the drop of a hat.
Excadrill is another gen 5 addition, and after a tumultuous history of ban and unban, it settles into the metagame as the best non-rain Rapid Spinner, a.l.a old Donphan. However, it instead boasts Steelix’s typing and a 135 base Atk, making sure that Jellicient cannot simply switch into its Spin with impunity in fear of eating a STAB Earthquake. Its most common set is an offensive spread but with Leftovers and Protect for longevity, befitting of a Rapid Spinner. Unlike most other Grounds, it prefers STAB Iron Head to Rock coverage, as the former hit Latios harder, and can help it beat Breloom. As a Spinner, it can either lean into an offensive spread with STABs, or a more defensive SpD spread that prioritises its laundry list of resistances, especially to Dragon, for better longevity. Though Sand Rush is banned, a Scarf set works perfectly fine to revenge kill, or get up a desperate fast Rapid Spin before falling. Sand Force comes in nicely here, as Exca runs all 3 types of moves that get the boost in its STABs + Rock Slide.
Garchomp dropped to OU this generation, but perhaps that was the chance it needed to flex its power on the metagame. While it’s never seen without its trusty Earthquake, the sheer breadth of sets this pokemon can and does run boggles the mind. The most popular is a very straightforward Choice Scarf set to elevate a great 102 base Spe, and would be great even with just 2 moves in Outrage and Earthquake. It can afford to run Dual Chop for Sash Zam or Multiscale Dragonite, or just straight up Dragon Claw as a more reliable 3rd move. The last move on a scarf set is usually a fire coverage, either Fire Fang or Fire Blast, to roast the likes of Skarmory, Bronzong, or Ferrothorn. As a sweeper, Garchomp leverages its forced switches well with a Substitute Swords Dance set that uses Salac Berry to boost its Spe past most opposing Scarf revenge killers, as its sheer STAB combination is so good on its own. If desired, one can run just an offensive Stealth Rocks set like other Ground types, but Garchomp’s Rough Skin means it has extra synergy with Rocky Helmet that really punishes U-Turn while being simultaneously immune to Volt Switch.
Gliscor gains the excellent Poison Heal this generation, giving it amazing passive recovery and immunity to statuses. For the most part, it uses its typing and access to reliable recovery to spread Toxic with Substitute, while having STAB Earthquake to slam the Steels and Poisons immune to the status. Being always poisoned means that it now has access to Facade as a really strong neutral move to complement its EQ, and thus the Swords Dance Roost set yet see a healthy amount of usage. While Gliscor can’t get past Skarmory at all, its general positioning against the rest of the physical metagame means it will probably always have value in a team, especially if running Taunt. As with all Ground types this generation, it can run a support Stealth Rocks set as well that spread statuses in the meantime.
Mamoswine is once again an excellent offensive threat. Having learnt Icicle Crash as a strong STAB Ice attack this generation, its general offensive coverage with just its STABs is very notable. As DragMag becomes a legitimate offensive force in the metagame, Mamoswine can be found with or against them, leverage Ice Shard to shut down the Salamence, Dragonite, or Garchomps one can find on those teams. Superpower is a great general coverage move to slam Ferrothorn and Kyurem-B with, and Stealth Rocks is always an option that goes well with priority and a Focus Sash.
Gastrodon gained a water immunity this generation, and has propelled into stardom as an anti-rain wall. Its distinction comes from being a Keldeo check that isn’t weak to Pursuit, unlike Jellicient and Latios, and instead spreads status of its own with Toxic and the ridiculous Scald. It also stops Thundurus-T cold, something many other Keldeo checks cannot claim. Physically defensive is the most common spread to fulfil this niche, and with proper support from the rest of its teammates to cover its vulnerability to Toxic and Grass types, Gastrodon is a stalwart defensive answer to many of the metagame’s biggest threats.
Seismitoad is Gastrodon but with Stealth Rocks, in essence. It does everything else Gastrodon does a little worse due to its poorer bulk and no access to Recover, but the role compression can be highly desirable on more offensive teams who prioritise the momentum that hazards give, rather than a long-term wall like Gastro is.
Hippowdon once again plays second fiddle to Tyranitar as a physically defensive Sand setter. Reliable recovery means it can act as a check to many strong physical threats and prevent their setting up with Whirlwind, while setting up Stealth Rocks of its own. Its poor special bulk and weakness to Rain spam means that it might not always put it as much work as it wants to against opposing Rain, but if you want your Sand setter to also be a physical wall, Hippo’s the one for the job.
Not mentioned: Dugtrio (R.I.P), Golurk, Nidoking, Nidoqueen
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A Great Herd Main Battle Tank Type XIX. IXTB-38A8r4. One hundred fifty tons of armor, molecular circuitry, guns, and hoverfans. Designed 638 thousand years ago and never having needed a single upgrade. A 180mm main gun that fires an eight pound plasma shell. Two rows of 80mm vertical launch systems capable of delivering a variety of variable fuzed munitions. A driver's, tank commander's, communication's officer's, and an electronic warfare officer's external 18mm quad barreled plasma machinegun that could be controlled inside or manually by partially exiting the appropriate hatch. Capable of reaching a top speed of nearly forty miles an hour. The crew can survive inside the compartment for up to 11 hours without discomfort. Single layer medium grade battlescreens often used on light frigate naval vessels. Waterproof, soundproof, able to be piloted and operated even in vacuum thanks to sixteen antigravity pods, although at a much slower speed and slower response.
The mighty armored fist of the Unified Military Council, in support of the Unified Civilized Council.
According to my trainers, the last time a single tank had been damaged to the point that it could not fight, excluding operator error or sabotage, was nearly 23 thousand years prior to my introduction to my first tank.
I was excited as I inprocessed. I was to be assigned to one of the most modern tank designs around, military war machine made manifest. Perfection achieved and domination assured. I was almost eager the day I was allowed to enter the motorpool and taken to where the tank I would be a crew member of was parked.
It was love at first sight.
My fellow crewbeings thought I was a bit insane, to be honest. I worked on my tank, learning everything about it that I could from the neo-sapient mechanics. The driver was happy I could start it up for maintenance, meaning he could continue on with his long running alcohol related binge.
Within a month I could tear apart my gunner's sight, even the firing mechanism, and rebuild it from spare parts found in the motor pool supply shed. I even knew workarounds and field repairs that existed only in esoteric manuals and passed down in whispers between mechanics.
I earned my "gunner's bite" at my first live-fire range, where I learned that it was best if I let my helmet push back a little instead of pushing it against the padded sight. Pushing my face against the padding, using only my forward eyes, concentrating on putting each shot right where I wanted it.
Everyone took notice when I scored a perfect 1,200 points.
Some were happy for me, considered what I'd done proof of the Great Herd's might.
Others were jealous, starting whisper campaigns that I had somehow rigged my software to give me an illegal edge during live fire gunnery practice.
My fellow gunners led the campaign to have my accomplishment gone over with a fine toothed comb, many of them accusing me, to my face, of cheating.
My gunner's station was pulled apart, each block of circuitry examined, each byte of firmware and software gone over, even the gearing examined closely to see if I had somehow pulled off the shroud at the base of the barrel and adjusted the microgears that did the minute changes to barrel angle and elevation.
In the end, my score would have been stricken from the record, since my gunner's sight had gotten early maintenance, the neo-sapient maintenance crew replacing it twenty years before necessary. I would have been sent to do manual labor as punishment, or perhaps worse.
There was even talk of a court martial to put me in my place.
Mil-Sec officers had arrived in our motor pool to place me under arrest when the sirens began to wail. Everyone looked around confused, even the Mil-Sec officers, at the tone of the siren.
It came over my implant at the same time as everyone's else, my lockout being lifted.
ATTACK IMMINENT -- PRECURSOR VESSELS IN SYSTEM IN FORCE
My platoon Most High began rearing up and down, screaming at all of us to get into ranks for inspection. The platoon Second Most High began galloping in circles, shrieking that we were all going to die.
He was wrong.
Only most of us were going to die.
--Excerpt From: We Were the Lanaktallan of the Atomic Hooves, a Memoir.
"I hate landing into an ongoing fight," General No'Drak said, staring at the various holotanks. He had been in the same place for six hours, watching everything take place. The counter-attack, the first in the five days since Confederate forces had arrived, was moving in fits and jerks.
"It's a mess out there," General Moffeta said, watching a map of the megacontinent where her air support assets were spread around widely.
"Are you concerned, Most High?" Grand Most High Ge'ermo'o asked.
"Always when even a single one of my men are engaged in combat," No'Drak admitted, tapping a cigarette against the railing he was leaning against. "There are a million ways this can all go sideways on us."
"Sir, signal from Space Force!" came the cry from below.
"Throw it up here," General No'Drak snapped, bringing up a secure holo-port.
The twinkling cone resolved into a tired looking Rigellian female with admiral's pips on the brow of her armored vac-suit. She had bags under her eyes from stress and her eyes were bloodshot. Static kept rippling across the hologram and General No'Drak knew it was from phased wave plasma motion guns and C+ cannons firing.
"General No'Drak here, can you hear me, Admiral?" the Treana'ad said, slowly and distinctly.
She spoke for a second, obviously to someone outside of view, then looked forward. "Admiral HawGawk here, General," the rippling went over the hologram and she waited a second. "We've got a status change out here."
"Go for sitrep," No'Drak said.
Ge'ermo'o watched interestedly. He had seen how his fellow Lanaktallan reacted to a changing situation obviously getting worse and was curious as to how the lemurs would react.
"Eighty plus point sources just came in at the Hellspace limit. The stellar stabilizers and the Hellspace interdiction craft from the Crusade of Wrath helped. We have eighty plus Harvester Class, including what look like mostly new classes, out near the far gas giant," the Admiral said.
"I repeat back, Eighty plus Harvesters at the far gas giant, primarily Type-III," No'Drak said.
The Admiral nodded. "At least three hundred are coming straight at you. I've detached two Battlecruiser Groups to defend the planet, but the heavy hitters have to stop those Harvesters from spamming ancillary vehicles and swarming you under," she said. The lights around her flashed and she rocked slightly to the side. "We were right not to break up into hunter killer groups to go after the last of them, looks like the initial wave was simply to pull us out of position."
No'Drak nodded. "So, whatever gets through, we're on our own," he said gravely.
Ge'ermo'o felt a little bit of fear at that.
"Sorry, General. Space Force has its hands full up here," she said. "We've already sent out a distress beacon. The Crusade ships have sent out a call for reinforcements, but with the Case Omaha on TerraSol, options are limited for them."
"Understood. Have you tactical forward what they can. Good luck, Admiral, and Fight the Ship," No'Drak said.
"Pound the Ground, General," the Admiral said, and then she was gone.
No'Drak tapped the cigarette a few times against his bladearms and Ge'ermo'o could smell the scent of freshly cut grain. The Treana'ad stared at the holotanks down below as he slowly put the cigarette into his mouth and brought out the lighter.
Ge'ermo'o was slowly learning Confederate map symbols, he could see how the soldiers of V Corps were spread all over the planet, fighting the landing Precursors and their forces.
General No'Drak unfolded his lighter with a snap of his fingers, spinning the striker in the same motion and bringing up a yellow flame. He slowly lit the cigarette, staring down. He puffed on it for a moment and exhaled the smoke around his footpads as he put the lighter away.
"The Precursors have adjusted their tactics," he said softly. "Never count on the enemy staying stupid."
"How many of the next wave do you think will reach the planet?" Ge'ermo'o asked. In his opinion, the planet was lost and there was nothing anyone could do about it. But if the lemurs were willing to fight, he would stand right here next to them.
He'd come to like them.
"Just a little over a third. Sixty or so units," No'Drak said. He brought up the map. "We got lucky they didn't catch us out of position. We knew there were still Googly-Eyes in the Oort Cloud, which meant either they were going to come back in again or we'd missed something."
"Harvester-Twenty-Nine is breaking up," Someone called out from the floor below. "Harvester Thirty-Eight has dropped out of formation, looks like someone got a piece of his engines."
No'Drak nodded.
The icons for the lighter units, the Dreadnoughts and below, were burning brightly. Space Force was concentrating most of their firepower on the massive Harvester Class units that had been forced to drop out further from the gravity well of the stellar mass burning brightly at the center of the system.
The Treana'ad officer knew that every kill counted with the big Harvesters. They'd sit out there and keep producing lesser units until the sun burned out if given the chance.
He had ordered the BOLO units to switched targets, ordering them to engage the incoming planetary assault units, leaving the already planet-side units to the ground forces.
It was a calculated risk, and General No'Drak was an excellent mathematician.
General Moffeta's units were hitting the Precursors as soon as they made atmosphere, pushing through the leading wave of fire to attack the Precursors during the short time their battlescreens were down. The interference from entering the atmosphere was scrambling the Precursor's sensors, putting their point defense offline. That let General Moffeta's units take long strafing runs at the massive machines.
No'Drak winced when one of the incoming Jotuns broke up at 15,000 meters up, the huge chunks tumbling to the ground.
The planet was taking a pounding.
General No'Drak made a motion, bringing up the communications section. The PFC who answered was a Terran had oversized eyes and whiskers.
"Is the hypercom still functional?" he asked before she could speak.
"Yes, sir," she said.
"Contact the Telkan system. Tell them we're going to need a full elven court here," No'Drak said. He sighed. "Tell them we're going to have massive Precursor wreckage as well as..." he paused, took a deep drag and exhaled it.
Ge'ermo'o noticed that it was pushing back the smell of freshly cut grain.
"We're going atom smasher. We've got over two billion civilians in shelters. Put out a request for evac ships, even on the junker channels," he said.
"Yes, sir," the female Terran said. Ge'ermo'o wondered why her eyes were so big. If they helped with her job, if her parents had possessed big eyes in their DNA, or if she just had liked them.
No'Drak cut the link and looked at the surrounding officers. "I'd give my mandibles to have Tik-Tak here."
That got chuckles.
No'Drak knew that the elven queens could repair the damage he was about to order his troops to commit to.
But if his men couldn't get it under control, couldn't smash the Precursor threat, there wouldn't be a planet to fix. He could see that the Precursors had arrived to strip mine the planet, probably down to gravel.
Part of him wondered why they wanted the planet so bad. The asteroid belts had been mined to nothing over the last twenty thousand years. Most of the easily accessible minerals were gone.
Then he remembered that elements of Third Armor were engaged with mining machines.
He looked at the icons for the Treana'ad Infantry Hordes and Air Mobile Clouds and a small part of him wished he was a Lieutenant again, charging across the ground in armor with his heavy weapons on the top of his abdomen.
After a moment he made a decision.
"Order all personnel on planet into armor and to draw weapons from the armory," he said. He turned to the two Lanaktallan. "Gentlebeings, I'd advise you to prepare yourselves."
"You think we will be attacked here?" Ge'ermo'o asked.
"Can't discount it at this time," No'Drak said. "The reinforcements were a high probability and it looks like our cards weren't as good as we hoped."
"Surely you won't be defeated," Ge'ermo'o said. "You won't withdraw!"
No'Drak shook his head. "No. There's too many people in shelters, too many people in hiding. We'll fight to the last."
"The Confederacy doesn't leave civilians behind to die," General Pulgrak said. He stretched, his shoulders popping. "Glad I qualified on my armor and weapons two months ago."
General Vandu licked her lips, looking around, her eyes moving back and forth. "Are we staying here?"
General No'Drak put away his cigarette. "Yes. We will still coordinate the battle, but we must be ready to join the ever put upon lower enlisted and junior officers should the Precursors assault our command and control area."
General Vandu nodded, her lips twitching in a smile. "Just standard body armor, or can we..." she started to ask.
"Put on power armor?" No'Drak asked. He gave the equivalent of a shrug. "There are several companies of power armor troops here to defend this base, you know that. If you wish to lead them from the front, you have my blessing."
General Vandu hurried off.
"She will see if the taste of combat is as sweet as the fantasy of combat awards," No'Drak said softly. He turned to his aide. "Let's suit up."
The Colonel nodded. "This way to the armory, General."
A Terran captain next to Ge'ermo'o touched his lower right elbow. When Ge'ermo'o looked at him, he noted how grave the Terran looked.
"If you Lanaktallan gentlemen will follow me, we should have time to fab and fit you with armor."
Ge'ermo'o was proud of himself for how calm he knew he looked as he nodded.
----------------
Trucker dropped down into his tank, slamming the hatch shut over him.
He'd waited till almost the last second. The tank shuddered as the lead of the debris wave hit his tank. The wave was thick dust, formerly ferrocrete and asphalt, all ripped up by the massive Precursor combat machine going nose first into the suburbs beyond the city and scraping the bedrock for nearly eight miles before it had lost momentum and slammed down into the channel it had carved.
"Can't see shit, sir," his driver said.
"Tell all units to hold position, give the air a minute to clear," Trucker ordered. He heard his radioman passing the orders and looked at his sensor tech. "How many?"
"I saw four entering atmosphere before that big monster hit," he said. "Maybe more. The sky's on fire."
"331, how's it look in there?" Trucker asked.
--rough shape-- the Mantid Engineer Team Leader admitted. --try not to let them hit you--
"We're a tank. We're a little obvious," Trucker chuckled. He tapped his software and tossed a meme at the Mantid team of his tank, with great big googly eyes, trying to hide behind a tree, with meters of hull and an eye on each side of the tree. The caption "I R HIDYN!" at the bottom.
That got back giggling emojis.
"All Regimental Commanders, check in," Trucker said. He scooped out his dip and slung it into the can. He repacked it while he waited for his commo tech to get in touch with the different regiments.
"Trucker wants a sit-rep," Colonel Dremsal heard faintly over the roar of his quad-barrel.
"TELL HIM I'M BUSY!" Dremsal yelled back. As soon as they'd moved in between the two massive Precursors their air support had come out to play.
The sky above him was a whirling gnashing death snarl, with 19th Air Cavalry Regiment fighting six times their numbers with seemingly infinite reinforcements. So far they'd only lost three strikers, but each casualty counted.
"Told him you were still alive and we've still got tanks even if we're rolling coal," his commo tech said. He put his hand to his ear. "Most High A'armo'o wants to talk to you."
"Put him through," Dremsal said. He let go of the quad-barrel and ducked back into the tank, pulling the hatch shut. The last thing he wanted is some Precursor machine getting past the battlescreens, reaching down into the tank, and snatching his head off.
"Dremsal here, go ahead," he said.
"We're coming up on your rear. We've got 15th Sustainment inside our ranks. We had to drop back from the river, large machines were making landfall," A'armo'o said.
Dremsal closed his eyes, bringing up how his vehicles were arranged. He gave the orders and shot A'armo'o his plan.
"You keep 15th covered, we'll drop back to get refit," Dremsal said.
"What, may I ask, is our target?" A'armo'o asked. He glanced back at the half dozen Telkan Marines on the back deck of his tank. A quick glance showed his second in command had several Terrans on the back and it looked like they were doing something important.
"Juggernaut. It looks like it almost broke up, but if they get the auto-factories running we'll be in a lot of trouble if we let it just sit there without busting up its plans," Dremsal said. "We'll knock out the supply lines, get close, and open fire on it."
"What about the Great Gobbler back there?" A'armo'o asked.
"He can watch from behind us. He won't be able to catch up to us," Dremsal said. "We'll keep ahead of it close enough to keep its attention, keep it from diving, but we won't let it get close."
"I understand. Your warplan is loaded, my men are moving up," A'armo'o said.
The tanks of the Great Herd slowed for a moment as the Terran tanks widened the wedge they were in, giving room for A'armo'o to bring his brigade up tight to the formation and slot into the middle. Once the manuever was finished, the Lanaktallan tanks formed another layer of protection for the lightly armored and lightly shielded (for Terran vehicles) vehicles of 15th Sustainment.
A'armo'o looked through his laser designator ranger at the big vehicle behind him that his men were still 'teasing' with random shots. He frowned and dialed up the magnification.
Was that... people on top of it?
-------------------
Vuxten stared down at the grinders below him, kneeling down on the ten foot thick protective housing right above them. He stared right into a massive glowing eye that looked back.
"Howdy, sailor," he heard a female's voice over the radio. "Buy a girl a drink?"
Vuxten chuckled. "We thought you were dead," he said honestly.
"I'm stuck. I came up from under me, I got caught on the cables and conveyors, then sucked into the grinder," Glory said. She wiggled her fingers. "I'm OK, probably scuffed up real bad, but I'm definitely stuck."
The gears tried to reverse, jammed, then tried to pull the massive skull and shoulder in.
"My feet and shins are outside the grinders, but they're hung up on my hips and shoulder," Glory said.
"Gonna have some greenies check it out, see if we can help you out," Vuxten said.
--hopefully no fall whirr blarg dead-- 471 said.
"Can you move your arms?" Plunex asked.
Glory shifted slightly and the grinders howled, showering sparks everywhere. "Nope. My arms are at bad positions, I've got no leverage."
"Lemme look," Casey said. He grabbed onto the edge of the housing and swung down.
"Wait..." Plunex said.
Casey dropped down, landing agilely on Glory's face.
"Aw man, first date and you try to do me right in the face?" Glory laughed.
"Don't kinkshame me," Casey said, moving slowly and carefully. Vuxten could see his feet had the bluish purple of active graviton generators around them.
"Really? Graviton? Wow," Glory said. "Do you have any idea what it feels like to have you walk on my face with grav-stickied boots?"
"Don't kinkshame me," Casey said again, his voice slightly distant.
"Kinkshaming is my kink," Glory laughed. The grinders whined, clattered, and bucked. "Ow, it's starting to pinch."
"Enough leverage and pressure and they'll bend the warsteel," Casey knelt down, looking at the gears.
"What do you see, Sergeant?" Sergeant Addox asked.
"Drive shaft is exposed on two of them. Look about three to four meters of endosteel," he said.
"What..." Plunex started.
"Shh," Vuxten said, watching the Terran. "Listen and learn."
"Looks like she shattered one of the grinders and when it tried to bring up a new one it hung up on her shoulder armor," Casey said.
To Vuxten it just looked like a whirring nightmare of massive toothed screws. He started tracing the lines, looking at them. A small window in the upper right of his vision showed 471 was zooming in on sections.
--stress points here here here here-- 471 said, tossing the red dots. --bearing housing covers here here here here--
"Casey, my greenie's ID'd a bunch of stress points and stuff," Vuxten said.
"Pass it to me," Casey said.
"What if it sucks you inside?" Vuxten asked Glory.
"My arm's at a bad angle. It might rip it off," she answered. "Beyond that, I'll probably be inside a massive area where ore and rock are pulverized and I'd like to avoid that."
Vuxten remembered the First Telkan War. "How's your coolant?"
"Good. All my lobes are intact," she answered.
"All right. We can get her out," Casey said. He jumped up and grabbed the lip of the top of the housing and pulled himself up with the hiss of loading frame hydraulics. Vuxten noticed his eyes weren't amber any longer. "I'll mark the areas, in order. Those armor defeating missiles you Telkan's use should do the trick."
"Sergeant Canton, I need ten men," Plunex sent out. "All with rocket launchers."
"Roger that, sir," the section sergeant radioed back.
"We're going to free your right arm first. Once we do that, I want you to pull it out, brace yourself, and we're going to blow the driveshaft on the one on your left shoulder, then the one pressing against your chest," Casey said.
"With missiles?" Glory asked.
"Your warsteel hull could take a direct hit from them. They're forged up for Precursor armor," Vuxten said.
"Units on top of Precursor mega-structure mining vessel, fire green star cluster flare if friendly," came a voice across the command channel. It was staticy and full of pops and clicks.
"I read you," Vuxten said. He ordered the round in his grenade launcher to reconfigure to the right munition, aimed it straight up, and chugged out three, slightly spread apart.
"We validate three green star clusters. Mark with single red," the voice said. "No voice commo, IU say again, we are not receiving you."
Vuxten fired a single red flare into the sky. "This is first platoon, HHC, First Telkan Marine Division," he said.
"We read one single red flare. Signal with red white red star cluster flares. I say again, red, white, red star clusters, when in need of assistance," the voice continued. "One green flare if under operation."
Vuxten fired another green.
"We read green. Will designate spotter to overwatch. Pop orange smoke or two green star cluster if in need of assistance at later time," the voice said. "Dremsal out."
"Telkan out," Vuxten said.
Dremsal looked back at the massive vehicle. He could see the Telkan Marines plainly, and they were involved with something on the massive vehicle's port side, but the huge scoop wheels blocked whatever it was they were looking at.
"Can we even hurt that thing?" He asked. "Without killing them?"
His gunner shook his head. "Negative, sir. That thing's shields could match a BOLO."
Dremsal frowned.
Where the hell had it come from?
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The other half of the guide I've been writing. This half focuses entirely on the various weapons, armors, and decals that stand above the rest. This is specifically for Tengoku climbing. After a lot of thought I decided that TDM meta is different enough that I should just make that it's own thread. Some weapons that are good for TDM are excluded here due to problems that hurt their potential for climbing, and some weapons that are listed here are not good in TDM.
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Notable Weapons:
Weapon Scaling: Weapon damage scales based off of STR and DEX. If a weapon has 30% STR scaling and 70% DEX scaling then 30% of your STR will be used in calculating damage while 70% of your DEX will be used to calculate the rest of the damage. Don't use weapons on fighter classes with stats that don't suit their scaling or you'll end up dealing some pretty pathetic damage.
Kamas-RE: This thing makes getting to F100 basically free if you're playing a ShooteAttackeAllrounder and it's at +7 or higher. Just get it. 100% DEX scaling.
Pickaxe: The Pickaxe's alt attack that throws sand has deceptively long range and causes a fairly long lasting stun effect. Use the pocket sand to stun a guy, then charge up a hit and obliterate them. This weapon is exceptionally powerful in 1v1 fights and that's exactly how many people you should be aiming to fight at any given time. The stamina equip requirement unfortunately prevents Attackers from using this weapon. 100% STR scaling.
Static Massager: Solid weapon with a huge ammo pool and decent damage. Many people have done loads of their early Tengoku climbing with this thing due to its good general usability and exceptional power for cleaning out screamer pits until you get real high up. Its expensive but lasts plenty long enough to justify the price and easier to build than many things on this list. 40% ST60% DEX scaling.
Flamethrower: The flamethrower is a weapon with exceptionally high DPS, massive ammo pool, solid rage move, and complete disbelief in the concept of blocking. Its only downsides being its fairly short range and need for frequent reloading. Use the Juggler decal to negate its reload downside. You can pair the Flamethrower with the Nail Gun to suppress an enemy while you advance to spray them with flames. This combo does take two weapon slots but it easily shuts down haters with dangerous weapons like the Kamas. I may not have personally used this weapon but I've seen plenty of evidence presented to me from reliable sources for me to believe its power. Unfortunately it's a stamina requirement weapon so Attacker can't touch it. 100% DEX scaling.
Magnum: This thing hits hard, can't be blocked, and has a forced stagger on every shot. The only downsides being its terrible accuracy (some people claim that there is a way to aim it to always land shots, yet never once have they provided any proof to support this claim) and small mag size. The Juggler decal can get rid of the issues cause by the mag size, and is more reliable overall than Billy the Kid for this weapon. The accuracy issue can be bypassed by just shooting from close range. This weapon is also one of the few in the game with an excellent set bonus decal. 30% ST70% DEX scaling.
M2G: This is by far the best weapon in the game but also the hardest to use. If you practice and get good with it you can take it basically anywhere. Even if you suck with it it still provides a massive amount of utility with firework lures and carefully aimed knife snipes. Just remember the priority of what ammo types are best to fire; 1.) Knife, 2.) Shotgun & Rifle, 3.) Firework, 4.) Grenade, 5.) Not even firing the weapon at all, 6.) Rocket. 70% ST30% DEX scaling.
Spear: Stabby stick kills man good. The basic pokes do good damage and have decent tracking, the heavy thrust does huge damage but it's a bit slow, and the rage move is a 100% knockdown. The only problem here is that it's a stamina requirement weapon so it's off limits for Attacker. 100% STR scaling.
Flail: The second best weapon in the game. Hits like a truck, has massive damage resistance for a short time while attacking, and the alt attack has some pretty good range (https://www.reddit.com/LetItDie/comments/ieco8b/why_flail_alt_attack_is_good/). If you buy any weapon from Hernia, it should be this one. 80% ST20% DEX scaling.
Flame Wand: I've never used this personally but its power is obvious. The ammo pool for this weapon is absolutely massive at uncap just like its damage. Its ideal range is similar to the flamethrower so it wouldn't be wrong to think of it as an alternative that trades the suppression capabilities for burst damage and the ability to create flame puddles to cook with. Remember that the flame puddles can't hurt you if you have at least 5% fire res. 10% ST90% DEX scaling.
Medusa Head: Personally I believe Medusa to be the 3rd best weapon in the game. While it lacks the raw power that the M2G & Flail have it has a lot more technical use that far surpasses every other in the game. Thanks to its homing and ability to be sped up with a second input while in the middle of any other animation, it's fairly easy to abuse the hit stun from the Medusa Head to hold a hater in place momentarily while you catch them in a combo with some other 1-handed weapon. 100% STR scaling.
Vajra of Light: My favorite weapon. Has some serious usability issues caused by its stamina equip requirement and its scaling being extremely problematic. Due to these issues, this weapon should never be upgraded beyond +7 as its full potential is lost forever (stam req too high for Attacker to equip it) if you go any further. Thankfully if you take the time to set it up for optimal usage it is in fact quite good. A basic combo that's easy to catch haters in paired with a powerful guard break alt attack that can be chained into after all but the last attack in its 4 hit combo. 50% ST50% DEX scaling.
Saber: The Saber is a very fast weapon with decent damage. If you can get a hater in a corner this weapon can infinitely stunlock them with its alt attack, which always electrocutes and goes through guards. 70% ST30% DEX scaling.
Pitching Machine: This is what you use as a Shooter to do any damage to Crowley at all. Also has a surprisingly powerful melee attack that uses very little durability. You can use the rage move to stagger Coen out of the roar at the start of the fight but this isn't a particularly good option for doing that since you need to use it before entering the fight which will kinda waste the rage if the boss was actually U10. It has let me down a lot of the time I've used it for any given purpose and for that reason I don't really recommend it unless you're playing a Shooter and don't have any other option for blunt damage. Even if you don't play Shooter build it anyway to farm Red Napalm and get the Blunt funshot from it. 20% ST80% DEX scaling.
Boxing Glove: Attack =/= Damage. The number on the weapon card is more of a vague suggestion of the kind of damage a weapon will be dealing per hit. That said, this weapon's damage isn't what makes it stand out. The Boxing Glove has rather good range for a melee weapon, some of the best stunlock potential in the game, and has a notoriously easy time knocking haters into the groggy state compared to any other weapon. This is like a sort of "get this guy out of my face" button you can use if something is being a big problem and your best solution to the problem is trying for a goretastic. I sure had a few moments like that on my climb to 351. THANKS 404. This weapon only gets more useful the further up you go and due to its ridiculous durability you can even use a T1 version if you're only using it for inducing groggy. 80% ST20% DEX scaling.
Bowling Ball: The first two hits of its combo are pretty decent but you use this for the rage move. So long as the ground is flat and clean (no plants or stuff like that) you send the rage off quite far and still nuke a dude with it, perfect for the long tightly packed hallways found in some of the floor layouts Tengoku uses. The rage also does absolutely massive damage to bosses while being fairly quick and long ranged making it the safest way to take chunks out of Jackson, Jin Die, and Crowley. This should be considered one of your highest priorities for success. 100% STR scaling.
Motorcycle: The main reasons to use this weapon are that a fully charged attack will always cause a knockdown, and its rage move is rather powerful for pit fights. While charged attacks can be chained indefinitely to stunlock a hater to death it's not the easiest thing in the world to land one on a hater that hasn't already been knocked down. Use the flail or something to knock them down initially then use the Motorcycle from there. Keep in mind the charged attack has exceptionally good forward movement which allows it to very easily catch haters attempting to roll away from you, or you can angle it a bit against a corner you're hiding behind as an enemy walks closer to suddenly jet out and knock that fool down. The rage move is decent but it can't hit the same enemy more than once, so it's a little lackluster unless you're using the tengoku variant of the Motorcycle that has fire damage, the Emperor. 100% STR scaling.
Bow: The second hardest weapon to use in the game. Thankfully it has such a hilariously high headshot multiplier (13x last I heard) that not only is it absolutely worth learning how to use and the 2nd weapon that should be bought from Hernia after the Flail, but it's even worth using on Striker despite its scaling cutting its damage in half on them. Oh and the rage move makes you invisible for about 3 seconds. You can use it to get out of a bad situation if you alert a particularly dangerous hater. 40% ST60% DEX scaling.
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Notable Armors:
Unlike the weapons section almost all of what's said here will apply to TDM as well, but a few pieces of armor will be left out as they are only good for TDM and not climbing. Helmets provide a very small portion of your defense compared to the rest of your armor and the differences in defense between helmets is small enough that you generally shouldn't care about the defense. It's the stat boosts that really matter here.
"What does Mixed Offenses mean?": You are using a mixed offense build if you are using weapons with damage scaling that favors having high Dex & STR instead of just one stat. If you're using the Kamas (100% DEX) and the Bowling Crusher (100% STR), then you are using a mixed build and will benefit from a helmet that boosts STR & DEX.
Night Scout chest & legs: This is the overall best permanently available armor set in the game. One of the highest defense totals paired with very good resistances. Just be careful fighting slash or electric weapons and you'll be just fine. The helmet is alright too, but it's nothing special and you'd get more out of using a different one from this list. Defense at +5 is 3850 for the chest & 2650 for the legs. Resists per piece are -9% Slash, +5% Blunt, +9% Pierce, +5% Fire, -9% Electric, & +5% Poison.
Iron Eagle RE full set: This set is weaker overall defensively than the Night Scout set but it does have a few reasons you may want to use it instead. The two main ones being a lack of any negative resistances and the fact that all pieces of this set have 50% higher durability than normal armor. I'll have some numbers below this section to better show how big of a boost that is. This version of the set is strictly easier to upgrade than the base Iron Eagle so it's a better investment if you can build up the 3M recycle points needed to buy it from Hernia's recycle shop. The helmet is by far the highest priority to get as it is the best DEX boosting helmet in the game. Defense at +5 is 993 for the helmet, 3536 for the chest, & 2441 for the legs. Helmet boosts are +9% HP & +16% DEX. Resists per piece are +9% Pierce, +5% Fire, & +9% Poison. Helmet durability at +5: 3250 compared to the usual 2500 Helmet durability at +19: 4288 compared to the usual 3298 Chest durability at +5: 5688 compared to the usual 4375 Chest durability at +19: 7505 compared to the usual 5772 Legs durability at +5: 4466 compared to the usual 3435 Legs durability at +19: 5892 compared to the usual 4532
Silent Sniper helmet: This helmet has the overall best stat boosts of any mixed offense helmet and solid defense. The chest & legs are direct downgrades to Night Scout though so there's no reason to use those. This helmet belongs to the War Ensemble faction which means it can be used with Night Scout, Iron Eagle RE, or Exo-armor on builds requiring matching faction armor. Defense at +5 is 1054. Boosts are -5% HP, +9% STR, +9% DEX, & +5% VIT.
Red Napalm legs: These get worse the further you upgrade any other pants since they gain very little from upgrades above +5. Their massive durability, excellent degradation rate of 5%, and extreme pierce resistance make them a solid option for someone with less upgraded equipment. The chest piece loses too much defense to really be worth it compared to Night Scout chest. Just be sure to avoid blunt damage at all costs, and of course, enjoy the view :^) . Defense at +5 is 2452, defense at +19 is 2818. Resists are -21% Blunt, +16% Pierce, +9% Fire, -20% Electric, & +9% Poison.
Warrior helmet: This helmet has the highest STR boost you'll get from any helmet (with one exception, but that helmet isn't ideal for climbing) as well as extremely high defense. This helmet reduces max HP but that isn't exclusively a bad thing. It's not great to have less HP but keep in mind it also makes your rage gain higher. This helmet also belongs to the Candle Wolf faction which means it can be used with Sword Dancer on builds requiring matching faction armor. Also it looks cool as fuck. Don't use the chest & legs from this set as they have terrible resists that make it weaker than Night Scout overall despite having slightly higher defense. Defense at +5 is 1114. Boosts are -9% HP, +14% STR, & +5% VIT.
Sword Dancer full set: This is the overall best armor set in the game. Unfortunately this was a lost bag set so it can only be gotten by buying the blueprints from Hernia for 24 DMs a piece. The helmet provides good mixed offense boosts, the chest & legs are the only pieces of armor that resist all 3 physical damage types, and it has the highest defense in the game apart from ZX Knight (which is not a good armor set due to horrible resists). The only reason you may not want to use this set is that its garish color scheme makes you look like a meth clown. Personally I enjoy making my characters look ridiculous so that's another upside for me. Defense at +5 is 1126 for the helmet, 4010 for the chest, & 2752 for the legs. Helmet boosts are +5% HP, +12% STR, +5% DEX, -10% VIT. Resists per piece are +5% Slash, +9% Blunt, +5% Pierce, +13% Fire, -13% Electric, & -13% Poison.
Exo-armor full set: This is an alternative to Sword Dancer that trades resistance to Slash & Fire for a large boost in Pierce res, reduced weakness to Electric, and a new resistance to Poison. This set was in lost bags and must be bought for DMs like Sword Dancer. The helmet is a direct upgrade to Night Scout with higher defense and the same stats except for an extra +8% VIT. Despite this upgrade there are still better options for running a DEX centric build. Defense is identical to Sword Dancer. Helmet boosts are -5% STR, +12% DEX, & +8% VIT. Resists per piece are -9% Slash, +9% Blunt, +13% Pierce, -9% Fire, -9% Electric, & +5% Poison.
Violent Grinder chest & legs: This is another alternative to Sword Dancer that trades its Pierce res and some of its Fire res for a resistance to Electric and a reduced weakness to poison. This set was in lost bags and must be bought for DMs like Sword Dancer. The helmet is not worth using for climbing as its boosts are purely negative for offensive stats. Defense is identical to Sword Dancer. Resists per piece are +5% Slash, +9% Blunt, +9% Fire, +9% Electric, & -9% Poison.
Reaper full set: THIS SET IS EXTREMELY DIFFICULT TO GET THE BLUEPRINTS FOR AND BUILD. With that warning out of the way, this set is really weird and has a handful of various positives and negatives compared to normal armor sets so lets go over those. This is the only armor set in the game with completely different resists on the chest and legs, +13% to everything split evenly between the two. This set has 2 different helmets that can be used to complete it, which are earned by completing the 41-50 stamp rally. The one for getting the stamps at all boosts STR, the one for perfecting every stamp boosts DEX. Both helmets grant innate headshot damage immunity while worn. Yes I'm serious. All pieces of this set have higher durability than normal armors (Dura comparison at the end of the section for this set). This set's pieces also have a degradation rate of around 5% so they stay at high defense for a very long time. This set does not have a faction which means it cannot be used with any of the "full set" decals like Professional Cosplayer. The chestpiece blueprint is earned by completing a quest to make it to F100 while the legs blueprint is available to purchase in Hernia's Bloodnium shop for 66666 Bloodnium. It'll be a long time before you can get those legs but it's fine since you probably still won't have the materials to actually get the damn set to a decent level by the time you get all that blood. Defense at +5 is 946 for the helmets, 3405 for the chest, & 2270 for the legs. The blue helmet boost is +12% STR and is actually not a bad choice for STR centered builds at all. The red helmet boost is +12% DEX, and while the boosts are weaker than other DEX boosting helmets you could do fine using this if you really want the headshot immunity and higher durability that bad. The chest resists are +13% Pierce, +13% Fire, & +13% Electric. The legs resists are +13% Slash, +13% Blunt, & +13% Poison. Blue/Red X-Ray Glasses durability at +5: 3000 compared to the usual 2500 Blue/Red X-Ray Glasses durability at +19: 3958 compared to the usual 3298 Chest durability at +5: 5250 compared to the usual 4375 Chest durability at +19: 6927 compared to the usual 5772 Legs durability at +5: 4122 compared to the usual 3435 Legs durability at +19: 5438 compared to the usual 4532
Jackal D full sets: These are extreme endgame armor sets and are far more ridiculous to get the blueprints for and build than even the Reaper set. I'm actually not going to talk about them because due to terrible durability and obscene shop prices, they're really not ideal for climbing and I made this section specifically to tell people not to go for them. They're amazing for TDM but there's no point if you're just trying to climb unless you're some god gamer like Khuron and basically never take hits to begin with (Obligatory Khuron plug https://www.youtube.com/channel/UClR3-fdqAT3qbd-x2kXTCRQ ). If you want to know about these then you're gonna have to wait for the TDM version of this thread or use the wiki.
Dishonorable mention, Barret Punisher: Despite Barret Punisher having the same defense as Night Scout I can't justify recommending it due to it lacking the Blunt resistance of Night Scout and being a giant pain in the ass to upgrade to uncap in comparison. Whoever decided this set should take carbon fiber & purple metals at T4 was a dickhole and ruined the potential of this otherwise decent and usable set. It's really not worth the effort but if you use any set that didn't make the cut for this list this is probably the best one.
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Notable Decals:
Utility vs. Damage: There's a few really good utility decals out there but you can't expect to make a build with no damage boosts and have it still kill easily. Try not to have more than 2 utility decals on a build for the best performance.
Decal stacking: Some damage boosting decals stack additively and some stack multiplicatively. Additive stacking is worse. The general rule is that anything with the same requirements to activate its effect will stack additively. Barbell & Golden Gym will stack additively, but Barbell and Professional Cosplayer would stack multiplicatively. Another example would be Barbarian + Professional Cosplayer. Barbarian x2 would be 1.2 + 1.2 = 1.4, Barbarian + Professional Cosplayer would be 1.2 x 1.2 = 1.44.
Treasure HunteSpy: I've written enough earlier on to justify its use already but you can also use this decal to check where enemies are and where they're facing from a safe place. You can buy this decal from the skillshroom shop after clearing F40. Spy is just Treasure Hunter but with 40% stamina use reduction for rolling and running. Spy is the best utility decal in the game and Treasure Hunter is only a little worse. This is a priority 1 choice for your utility slots.
Vampire: Vampire is the training wheels we all use to keep us alive until we have things figured out well enough that we don't need it anymore. It's always at least a decent choice for pure melee builds though. Vampire is a priority 3 Utility decal, priority 1.5 on pure melee.
5 Leaf Clove6 Leaf Clover: 5LC isn't too hard to get a premium of but even if you can't get it you can easily buy it from the shop for a few skillshrooms. Critical hits do 1.5x damage so you can consider the +20% crit chance from 5LC as a sort of +10% average damage increase. The more decals you have boosting crit damage the stronger crit chance boosts become. However, I strongly advise against going all in on crit decals because the crit damage ones are worse the more of them you have and you're just making your build fall apart even harder when you run into someone with Conqueror's Seal. 6 Leaf Clover is the same as 5LC but it's 30% instead of 20%.
Bull/Raging Bull: These are actually the best damage boost you can get out of any build without a 5 star decal. They're a bit scary to use since you have so little health to work with and because you can't eat beasts whenever you see them to restore hunger your stamina will eventually become a problem. I have a hard time suggesting the use of these for anything beyond destroying the first 3 forcemen.
Serial Killer: If you're using the Kamas or M2G as one of your main weapons this decal is a massive damage boost so long as you play smart and carefully. I wouldn't advise using it if you're only using melee. A common misconception about this decal is that the +100% Attack means you're doing double damage. In a vacuum that would be correct, but this leaves out the fact that Defense exists. An enemy's defense doesn't magically become higher when your attack increases so your damage is calculating a significantly higher number against that same defense. Serial Killer is more than double damage in practice. Not important to know since everyone's dying anyway but I wanted to explain that.
Marathon RunneUltra Marathon Man: 50% reduced sprint stamina use is an amazing quality of life effect for climbing. You can get through floors so much faster when you can just sprint almost the whole time. UMM is the same as Marathon Runner but with 80% reduction instead. This is a priority 2 utility decal.
Professional Gymnast/Legendary Gymnast: This is decent for a very different reason than Marathon Runner. If you're running a pure melee build then Kamas haters become a pain to deal with. Thankfully, Kamas is completely incapable of damaging anyone while they're in the middle of a roll animation. This will greatly increase the amount of rolls you can perform without exhausting your fighter making it much easier to waste their bullets. Legendary Gymnast is the same as Pro Gymnast but significantly better. This is a priority 2 decal on pure melee builds, and a priority don't-equip-this-shit on anything else.
Barbell/JokeGolden Gym: Barbell is very basic but it has no restrictions and it's not that unlikely you'll have gotten a copy of it somehow by the time you've made it to Tengoku. If you aren't swimming in 5 star decals Barbell is probably a prime choice for you. Joker is Barbell but with Tank, Silver Heart, Wolf, and 150% of an Emerald mixed in too. Joker is a very solid quality of life decal and the closest anything comes to a direct competition with the best decal in the game, UFR. Golden Gym is Barbell but twice as strong.
One Shot One Kill: OSOK is a massive damage boost for a single slot but is only viable on a very small selection of weapons (Kamas, Sniper Rifle, M2G, and Bow). Personally I don't care for this decal at all since relying on it for your damage sets you up for a bad time against haters with Super Helmet or Super Helmet 2, but if your collection isn't that great you've gotta use what you have.
Barbarian: This decal is stronger than Barbell if you're only using 2 handed weapons. If your build uses a good mix of 2 handed & 1 handed weapons I'd say just go with Barbell instead. That said, Barbarian is much easier to get from stews or by trading some skillshrooms for a non-premium copy.
Addict decals: If you have the addict decal for your main weapon it's probably a good idea to use it. Using addicts hurts your diversity but it's not a big deal if it's something like the Kamas or Flail that can cover a wide variety of situations.
Juggler: This decal's usefulness ranges wildly from weapon to weapon. Some don't care about it much at all while it's best in slot for others. I'm just going to go over the various weapons affected by this decal and explain why exactly it's a good or bad choice for them. Stun Gun - Stun Gun's reload is time delayed and that isn't changed by any reload speed decals so it's completely useless. M2G - Juggler only affects the speed of a small part of the animation. It is faster but the difference is so tiny it'll basically never matter. Sniper Rifle, Rocket Launcher - The problem these guns face is horrible fire rate, being locked in place for a long time after firing, and very small spare ammo pools. Their reload speeds mean nothing in light of these crippling downsides and I genuinely can't think of any situation where Juggler would matter at all. Welding Gun - The real problem is the charge time before firing and the short effective range. This weapon doesn't really work unless you're using it in situations where reloading it wouldn't be a problem in the first place, so Juggler isn't a good choice. Static Massager - The mag size is too big for this to be realistically worth it. Firework Launcher - While a shorter reload is nice the delay after firing is very long and the mag size is very large for how slow firing this weapon is. It's not a great choice even if it's not completely useless. Pitching Machine - This weapon benefits a good bit from faster reloads but due to the slow initial fire rate you usually need to jump through some hoops to keep a situation where the reload speed mattered in your favor anyway, so it doesn't feel too great. Shotgun, Kamas, Crossbow - All of these weapons appreciate the utility of drastically shorter reloads but don't necessarily need it more than another damage boost. Try it out and see if it's right for you. Nailgun - The only good use case for this thing is to clear screamers sub-F40 or as a tool to hold haters in place while you get closer to use the Flamethrower. Because of this, there is no reason to ever not use Juggler with this weapon. Flamethrower, Magnum - These two weapons lose their only real times of vulnerability by using Juggler and become significantly better at what they do as a result. If either of these weapons is one of the main ones in your build, you're a fool for not using Juggler if you have it. I would choose Juggler over almost any damage decal for them.
Billy the Kid: This gives half the reload speed bonus of Juggler but comes with some extra damage. Some weapons prefer Billy over Juggler while others should just stick with Juggler. Stun Gun, M2G, Welding Gun, Sniper Rifle, Rocket Launcher - Billy is a better choice than Juggler for these weapons due to the damage boost but still isn't particularly useful. Pitching Machine - This weapon does Blunt damage so Billy doesn't even work on it. Don't use it. Flamethrower, Magnum - Billy's speed bonus isn't fast enough to eliminate the vulnerability periods entirely so these weapons should just use Juggler instead. Nail Gun - The use cases for this weapon don't change so Billy is worse than Juggler. Static Massager, Firework Launcher - Billy is a much better choice than Juggler and doesn't feel that bad to use with these. Shotgun, Crossbow - You can use either one really, but the damage bonus of Billy will probably be better in a lot of cases. Kamas - Billy's speed is good enough and it will outperform Juggler in almost every situation thanks to the extra damage.
Mad BombeVampire Queen: Use with the M2G to lure a group to one spot, the kill one guy with a knife and watch as Mad Bomber kills the rest of the group. Also great for screamer pits in Tengoku. Vampire Queen is the same thing but with Vampire mixed in. Don't use Vampire & Vampire Queen together, the lifesteal effect doesn't stack. While this is a damage decal it should be considered a Utility decal. With that in mind, they're both priority 1.
Critical Attack/Below the Belt: There's a common misconception about these decals regarding what exactly they do. People often think that the 30% extra damage is added to the crit multiplier, resulting in crits dealing 1.8x damage. This is incorrect. The 30% extra damage is applied after the crit multiplier, resulting in 1.5 x 1.3 = 1.95x damage. With that said these decals are obviously really damn good but I'd advise against using them if your total crit chance is any lower than 50%. I'd also advise not using CA & BtB together if you can make a good build without one of them since relying too much on crits for your damage sets you up for a bad time against any haters with Pro Tip: Conqueror's Seal.
Trigger Happy: Equip Kamas & Assault Force armor, turn off brain, kill many men. This decal is extremely powerful for farming and takes basically no skill whatsoever to use. If you have it I'd advise using it until you can make a good build without it. I can't stand this bullshit but I'm not about to fault anyone for using a great farming tool. I'd rather people succeed with stuff that annoys me than fail with stuff that doesn't.
Food Fighter: This seems like a dumb meme at first glance but there's actually a lot of potential here. This makes eating something like 4x faster which has a variety of uses. You can near instantly use a Guardshroom if you suddenly find yourself in a situation you'd definitely die in without it, or you can eat a barbmeat and heal to full HP near instantly on demand. Try it out. Priority 2 utility decal.
Vigilante: One of the very few set bonus decals that's actually great. The Magnum is a very good weapon and its best used at close range whether you're using this decal or not so Vigilante just makes it better at what it would do anyway. The existence of the Iron Eagle RE armor set and Lethal Weapon (the Tengoku variant Magnum with fire damage) also help push this decal's power even further. Try it out.
Warrior Monk: One of the top 5 strongest decals in the game. 30% extra Slash & Blunt damage is amazing enough but the extra 20% pierce resistance makes it a prime choice for almost any build. Also happens to be one of the 2 decals that stacks multiplicatively with everything without being an Addict or set bonus decal. If your build uses a strong Slash/Blunt weapon as one of the main weapons then you'll benefit greatly from equipping this. #1 decal for any pure melee build.
Niten Ichi-ryu: The restriction is a problem but the damage boost is massive. The 50% reduced roll stamina cost is a big help against the many ranged weapons of F40+ and makes pure melee drastically easier to manage. If you can work well with a 1-handed weapon in most situations I strongly advise using this.
Lion Man: Bootleg Critical Attack. The critical damage bonus applies to both hands so long as you have the Lion Knuckles in one of them so you can easily use this to push your damage a little further if your collection is missing some of the stronger decals. The Lion Knuckles aren't a bad weapon either, but they're better in TDM than the tower.
Final Hero: I don't consider Legendary Hero to be a good decal due to it only being equal to a regular Bull and having nothing else going for it. Final Hero is a bit stronger and has the HP regen that'll often help you top off your health after taking a little bit of chip damage from something like a lizard biting you or a weaker weapon like the nailgun landing a hit on you. It's an alternative to Serial Killer that trades a big chunk of power for some slow (but still useful) passive healing and a big damage reduction on the first hit you take while the effect is active (while you're at full HP). If you're bad at keeping Serial Killer active (like me) then this might work out better for you. It's also way better on Attacker than any other class for high climbs since Attacker tends to die if they get hit at F250+ anyway. I think a lot of people underestimated this decal when it came out because of how unreliable the other Hero decals are. Try it out for a while before saying it's bad. I'm not the only person that's taken it to F300+ afterall, and I have a feeling I won't be the last.
Ultimate Fighter's Return: Best decal in the game. No matter what you're doing, you're doing it 20% better if you have this decal equipped. There is no situation in which this decal isn't a premium choice. Prioritize over ALL other decals if you have it.
Professional CosplayeSylvia Christel: This decal is extremely powerful but a bit restrictive. There's no reason not to use it if you have it and it should always be prioritized over any other decal in the game due to its sheer power. The restriction of needing to wear a full set is misleading as you only need to wear armor from the same faction, not the same set. This also means you can't use this decal with factionless armor like the Reaper & Jackal sets. Sylvia is basically a slightly weaker Pro Cosplayer from the last crossover event 2 years back. If you don't already have Sylvia you never will. Just use 6 Leaf Clover in place of Sylvia if you don't have it. The difference isn't that big.
Pro Tip: Conqueror's Seal: Don't climb with this decal I'm only listing it here so people know what it does. Anyone wearing this decal will never be critically hit by any attacks. This effect is extremely powerful defensively since it completely destroys any crit builds.

Well, well, well it's time to buy a new laptop but you're tight on budget under 1000 you say. Sum bitchy youtubers come and say G5 SE is the budget king you see the sexy price tag of 829 looks at custom options pick the 4 zone RGB (We all know RGB = 89% increase in performance). At first i thought SE meant sucky edition due to the build material but boy was I wrong it meant special edition.
I got the laptop first thing I goddamn see is a paper box with a Dell logo what am I a trash can for 829 We deserve better. I pulled everything out and a piece of hair Jesus didn't know Michelle, I mean Micheal Dell gives us hair Jesus man free hair who doesn't love free hair! Contents were A manual plain & boring, A 240 watt killer machine i mean charger (seriously you can kill someone with this charger man weighs fucking 3lbs and its fucking hard as a brick (guess why it is called power "brick" then), and the Dell G5 i mean sucky i mean special edition.
I turned it on first thing i saw was Service tag not entered (Wow dell i bought this off your website and didn't bother to enter the service tag into the BIOS) The laptop rebooted after i press continue, the winds of Valor struck me the fans went VROOM. Caught me off guard and my soul went out of me for quick three seconds and fell off my chair.
The laptop booted with keyboard lights as blue (I hate blue ALOT). I check the ports I didn't watch no reviews until 2 months with this laptop (AKA what all tech well most tech enthusiast do to not spoil the performance of this laptop). You can change lighting through Alienware Command Center and did I mention that the GMODE isn't useless as it has a 10% overclock in power or in basic raised power limit by 10%.
The ports were as bad as my XPS from 2015 (Well Uncles XPS) on the right it comes with a 7.4mm barrel plug followed by a Mini Display Port then followed by a HDMI 2.0 then followed by a SUPASPEED 3.2 Gen USB then followed by a RJ45 Ethernet Port THEN followed by a USB Type C. On the left we got A Kensington Lock followed by 2 USB 2.0 THEN FOLLOWED by a single audio jack both mic and audio are supported and then accompanied by what I look for in most laptops a SD card slot or reader.
The HDMI and MINIDP connects to dGPU (Rx 5600M) and the type - C connects to the iGPU (Vega 7 or 8) This laptop has audio issues usually either no sound or wave (in some laptop) can be fixed via audio driver update. Then a next issue is external monitor it can be fixed by downloading recommended drivers off of AMD website.
I talked to a Dell "expert" (AKA sum random Indian douchebag (not saying Indians are dumb). They claimed that 100C is fine. Fine is a overstatement very much 100C isn't fine for any laptop and that CPU TDP of 80 watt scared me this is the ryzen 5 and max APU (CPU and iGPU) can pull around 130 watts which is a lot. and 175 watt max on the dGPU. makes the laptop scream for help. As a "tech enthusiast" myself that was alot for a laptop this size.
The problem is that SmartShift isn't good for this laptop or anything and yes anything as in Ps5 so far the Ps5 is getting downright DESTROYED by the XBOX SERIES X. So it's not AMD fault i can see their vision but how the OEM companies is pull the power and the values it's terrible
100C max of CPU and 96C max of GPU while on throttling isn't good for any laptop (excluding Desktop replacements they're balls to the walls Desktop in a laptop size with 24 heat pipes and two HULK size fans).
Around December I found out about a telegram group and joined it which led me to using reddit and seeing this group. This is where the real cons of this laptop are, its very very inconvenient to get the FULL CONTROL of YOUR very OWN laptop. So basically you have to do a BIOS injection to disable smartshift and Powertune this laptop to get the 60-89% perf boost im getting its a hassle to be all honest there's a risk not with the BIOS injection but with the power tuning mess up one thing or wrong values, then your laptop is gone but if you read the guide carefully you will get max performance.
Sirsquishy today has gotten 88 fps avg CP2077 ultra which is higher than my 3070 1080p ultra at 81 fps but its not a surprise as im getting 67 - 75 fps at 80 watts and he's getting 88 on 110 watts. But you have to have the cooling to do 110 watts as dell 4.5W/m.k thermal paste isn't gonna help the situation.
So in all honesty I don't recommend this laptop as you can get a 1660 ti unless your willing to take a risk and a hassle then you are going to see 2070 desktop to 3070 perf.
PROS: Good potential
Excellent GPU
6 Gigz VRAM
6 core minimum
Best Budget Laptop under 900
or 73K(rupees)
CONS;
inconvenient
Build Quality
Stock gets beat by 1660ti

"Its DNA is said to contain the genetic codes of all Pokémon, so it can use all kinds of techniques...."
The "Under The Lights" article series provides deeper dives on Pokémon, ones with breakout potential in ongoing formats. My last look at today's featured 'mon was many moons (in a time when GBL was just a twinkle in Hanke's eye, and there had been no such thing as a "move rebalance" yet) and nearly 150 articles ago, but with a format about to hit where it has top tier potential, it is time once again to put Mew, the ultimate Pokémon Swiss army knife, back under the lights.

MEW

Psychic Type
Attack: 121 (119 High Stat Product)
Defense: 120 (122 High Stat Product)
HP: 128 (129 High Stat Product)
(Highest Stat Product IVs: 10-15-13, 1499 CP, Level 16.5)
So first, a caveat to frame everything below: while I still very much want to go back and do a FULL look at Mew across all three leagues at some point, that is a massive undertaking (I don't think anyone has even gone in depth on Mew in ONE league like I did so long ago), and I frankly just don't have the time for that right now. (Maybe when things are hopefully slower in December or January?) For today, I am focusing once again on just Great League, and more specifically on Kanto Cup. Because I have gotten more questions about Mew than anything else for Kanto, and I barely even mentioned Mew in my full budget/meta analysis on Kanto Cup because it IS such an arduous endeavor. I responded to some folks hinting at that and saying that Mew would deserve an entire article in and of itse--wait a minute. Why not just WRITE a feature article on it?
And so here we are.
Anyway, it is obviously the movepool that will be the primary focus of this article, but let's start simply with just the stats for now. Mew is pretty average across the board in terms of Attack, Defense, and HP. That's not a bad thing though. Its Attack and overall bulk are comparable to Swampert and Froslass, for example, and you know how well THEY perform in Great League!
Many of the major Psychic types in Great League come with a secondary typing (Steel, Fighting, Flying, Ground, etc.). So as a reminder, pure Psychics like Mew are inherently weak to Dark, Ghost, and Bug damage, and resist Fighters and opposing Psychics.
Okay, now strap in. We're going to at least list ALL of Mew's currently available moves, and this alone could take a little while. If I've done my math right, there are 312 possible combinations.
Fast move options first, in alphabetical order.
(DPT = Damage Per Turn, EPT = Energy gained Per Turn, CD = Cooldown turns; 1 Turn = 0.5 Seconds)
Fast Moves:

• Charge Beam (Electric, 1.67 DPT, 3.67 EPT, 1.5 CD)
  
• Cut (Normal, 3.0 DPT, 2.0 EPT, 0.5 CD)
  
• Dragon Tail (Dragon, 3.0 DPT, 3.33 EPT, 1.5 CD)
  
• Frost Breath (Ice, 3.5 DPT, 2.5 EPT, 1.0 CD)
  
• Infestation (Bug, 2.0 DPT, 4.0 EPT, 1.5 CD)
  
• Poison Jab (Poison, 3.0 DPT, 3.5 EPT, 1.0 CD)
  
• Pound (Normal, 2.5 DPT, 2.0 EPT, 1.0 CD)
  
• Rock Smash (Fighting, 3.0 DPT, 2.0 EPT, 1.5 CD)
  
• Shadow Claw (Ghost, 3.0 DPT, 4.0 EPT, 1.0 CD)
  
• Snarl (Dark, 1.67 DPT, 4.33 EPT, 1.5 CD)
  
• Steel Wing (Steel, 3.5 DPT, 2.5 EPT, 1.0 CD)
  
• Struggle Bug (Bug, 3.0 DPT, 2.67 EPT, 1.5 CD)
  
• Volt Switch (Electric, 3.0 DPT, 4.0 EPT, 2.0 CD)
  
• Waterfall (Water, 4.0 DPT, 2.67 EPT, 1.5 CD)
  

STILL a who's who of mostly mediocre moves... despite many move shakeups since Mew's release, these are still mostly so-so moves at best, with a few notable exceptions. Let's get this out of the way: Cut, Pound, Rock Smash, and Struggle Bug are all bad, bad moves. 3.0 is considered exactly average for damage output and energy generation for fast moves. If a move is below average in one category, it better be above average in the other or there's really no reason to consider it. And Cut, Pound, Rock Smash, and Struggle Bug all break that mold in the wrong way, having one stat at or below average... and the other stat below average as well. They are all non-starters.
Others with above average damage and below average energy generation (Frost Breath, Steel Wing) or the opposite of higher EPT but below average DPT (Charge Beam) are viable, but unexciting. Personally, I recommend TMing away any of these fast moves for PvP purposes.
And then there are the standouts....

• Snarl was 2.67 DPT/3.67 EPT move way back when, but now it has one of the very highest EPTs in the game (4.33 EPT), representing Mew's highest energy potential and making it an exceptional move. It is a strictly better Charge Beam in a better typing.
  
• Dragon Tail and Poison Jab have above average EPT while maintaining the "average" 3.0 DPT, and both come in typings with good overall coverage.
  
• Waterfall has way above average damage in exchange for dipping just below average in energy generation.
  
• Volt Switch used to be Mew's WORST fast move back in the day, with a putrid line of 2.4 DPT, 2.0 EPT, and a 2.5 second Cooldown. 🤢 But now, it is by far one of its best, with good steady damage and way above average energy gains. But there are two strikes against it. Volt Switch is very slow, with an awkward 2 full seconds for each fast move to complete its cycle and allow you to take further action, which can be very inconvenient when you're rushing to make use of those energy gains and fire off a charge move. And second, it's not the greatest typing, with several common typings (Grass, Ground, Dragon, and opposing Electrics) all resisting it.
  

These moves are all viable, and if you're running out of TMs to the point that you may end up stuck with one of the many poor move options above if you keep TMing, you can stop here. I will at least briefly show what each of these can do for you in Kanto Cup and beyond.
But despite move shakeups over the last year of PvP play, there is still one move you really, REALLY want above all others, regardless of charge move(s) or role you want Mew to fill on your team, and that move is Shadow Claw. It is strictly superior to both Dragon Tail and Poison Jab, matching their damage output and exceeding their energy generation, while also having a lower cooldown than Tail (lower cooldowns making it easier to avoid oveundertapping). On paper, it has the same DPT and EPT as Volt Switch, but half the cooldown, making it far less awkward to race to critical charge moves and/or dip out of battle before the opponent can muster a proper response. Claw is unfortunately resisted by Dark types, and double resisted by Normal types, but it does rip into another Mew nemesis--Ghost types--for super effective damage, as well as the many popular Psychic types (hey there, Hypno!), and has very wide neutral coverage. Even Dragon Tail, with its generally wide neutral coverage, is resisted by a greater number of relevant Pokémon in open GBL, including all the varied Steels (Skarmory, Bastiodon, Jirachi, Steelix, Melmetal, Lucario, Registeel... yeah, it's a pretty big and relevant list) and Fairy types. And in Kanto Cup, while there ARE numerous Normal types, only a very small handful (Snorlax, Wigglytuff, and MAYBE Lickitung) are likely to actually come out and play... and the only viable (and the only eligible!) Darks are Alolans: A-Muk and A-Raticate. So you can quite literally count on one hand the number of meta Pokémon in Kanto Cup that resist Shadow Claw. Out of the 3 DPT and >3 EPT moves, Claw is almost unquestionably the best, and especially in Kanto Cup.
Things are not so clear cut with the charge move(s) of choice, however. There are a slew to choose from:
Charge Moves:

• Ancient Power (Rock, 45 damage, 45 energy, 10% Chance to Raise Attack/Defense +2 Stages)
  
• Blizzard (Ice, 140 damage, 75 energy)
  
• Bulldoze (Ground, 80 damage, 60 energy)
  
• Dark Pulse (Dark, 80 damage, 50 energy)
  
• Dazzling Gleam (Fairy, 110 damage, 70 energy)
  
• Dragon Claw (Dragon, 50 damage, 35 energy)
  
• Energy Ball (Grass, 90 damage, 55 energy)
  
• Flame Charge (Fire, 65 damage, 50 energy, Raises Self Attack +1 Stage)
  
• Flash Cannon (Steel, 110 damage, 70 energy)
  
• Focus Blast (Fighting, 140 damage, 75 energy)
  
• Grass Knot (Grass, 90 damage, 50 energy)
  
• Gyro Ball (Steel, 80 damage, 60 energy)
  
• Hyper Beam (Normal, 150 damage, 80 energy)
  
• Ice Beam (Ice, 90 damage, 55 energy)
  
• Low Sweep (Fighting, 40 damage, 40 energy)
  
• Overheat (Fire, 130 damage, 55 energy, Lowers Self Attack +2 Stages)
  
• Psychic (Psychic, 90 damage, 55 energy, 10% Chance to Lower Opponent Defense -1 Stage)
  
• Psyshock (Psychic, 70 damage, 45 energy)
  
• Rock Slide (Rock, 80 damage, 45 energy)
  
• Solar Beam (Grass, 150 damage, 80 energy)
  
• Stone Edge (Rock, 100 damage, 55 energy)
  
• Surf (Water, 65 damage, 40 energy)
  
• Thunder (Electric, 100 damage, 60 energy)
  
• Thunderbolt (Electric, 90 damage, 55 energy)
  
• Wild Charge (Electric, 100 damage, 45 energy, Lowers Self Defense -2 Stages)
  

A fun fact for those who are seeing a review on Mew for the first time: Mew has no Flying moves. It has at least one move of each type except for that. The more you know....
As we did with the fast moves, let's see if we can eliminate any really poor charge moves and pare down our analysis. First let's pluck out the moves that are the only one of their typing: Surf (for Water), Dazzling Gleam (for Fairy), Bulldoze (for Ground), Dark Pulse (for Dark), and Dragon Claw (for Dragon) are the only charge moves available of their respective typings, so they make the cut... for now.
Big slow moves can be okay, but not if they don't give some kind of distinct advantage. For that reason, I think we can safely eliminate Hyper Beam, which, as a Normal type move, will never offer any real advantage. Solar Beam has the same cost and damage as Hyper Beam, but with a typing that will at least SOMETIMES hit for super effective damage, so it's better... but that being said, there are better, faster moves available in their same typing (Grass Knot and Energy Ball), so Solar Beam doesn't really have a place. Same with Blizzard... Ice Beam is going to be more useful overall if we want Ice damage. And Psyshock makes Psychic (the move) mostly moot, so we'll push Psychic off the raft. Same thing with Thunder and Thunderbolt... Wild Charge is also available and is a better all-around Electric move than both of them, so Thunder and Bolt are out as well.
Similarly, while Flash Cannon could be labeled a big slow move with a faster move of the same typing being available, that other Steel move, Gyro Ball, costs only 5 less energy and deals 30 less damage. Flash Cannon is a much better move overall, so it's in and Gyro Ball is out. I'm also going to eliminate Low Sweep for the same reason. Yes, the other Fighting move Focus Blast is very slow, but Low Sweep is just a terrible, terrible move, with just 40 damage for 40 energy. You're better off using something like Surf or Dragon Claw, even against things weak to Fighting, because they will still both end up dealing more damage for the same (or even a cheaper!) cost.
The final typing to tackle is Rock. There are THREE moves available and you'll notice I have not yet eliminated any of the three. When I wrote the original Mew article, Ancient Power was stil a 70 damage move at the time, so it made the cut... but now, in its humbled state, there's no need for it, so it goes too.
So, that leaves us with Bulldoze, Dark Pulse, Dazzling Gleam, Dragon Claw, Energy Ball, Flame Charge, Flash Cannon, Focus Blast, Grass Knot, Ice Beam, Overheat, Psyshock, Rock Slide, Stone Edge, Surf, and Wild Charge, 16 remaining from the original list of 25. Now comes the heavy number crunching....
One of the main jobs you want to do with Mew is counter Hypno. Mew resists Confusion while dealing super effective damage to Hypno with Shadow Claw, but Claw alone is not enough. What you need to guarantee the win there is a non-resisted move that you can fire off at least twice so that at least one can (hopefully) get through unshielded, AND deal damage sufficient to finish Hypno off. Out of the remaining 16 moves, only Dark Pulse, Dragon Claw, Energy Ball, Grass Knot, Ice Beam, Rock Slide, Stone Edge, and Surf fit both of those criteria. Wild Charge does as well, but each use comes with a very painful debuff, so ideally you're not left with THAT as your only option. Dark Pulse is not suprisingly the most effective, leaving Mew with 2/3 of its HP as the second Pulse kills Hypno immediately. The next closest are Surf and, surprisingly, Stone Edge. Surf is able to be used THREE times, but also has the option to throw only two and pocket energy for the next 'mon up, which costs Mew only 14 HP and leaves it with one Surf charged and a second only 2 more Shadow Claws away. That is some GREAT flexibility. Stone Edge wins by just dishing out BIG neutral damage that leaves Hypno one Claw (actually like 2 HP) from death, with Mew having plenty of life to get that last bit of damage in afterwards. A further surprise: Rock Slide, generally considered a better Rock move overall, falls short.
So let's start there, with Surf and Stone Edge, pitted against the whole Kanto core meta. You can see it gets Mew to over a 50% win rate, which is nice to see. And there are some big names on there, including Lapras and Dewgong, A-Wak and Charizard, Articuno and Zapdos, both Ninetales, both Raichus, Machamp and Poliwrath, Golbat, Beedrill, and Alolan Sandslash. That's a nice list! And it's actually a hair better than that... notice that Hypno is mysteriously listed as a loss. How can that be? Well, obviously it's not... as noted already, Surf AND Stone Edge are each able to take Hypno out, so ignore the awkward timing of this silly sim that flags it as a loss. In this case, just ride ONE of the charge moves to victory. Another hidden win? Alolan Graveler, which the sim shows as a loss by default but, as you can see, Mew can win with Surf alone before A-Grav can reach a killer Stone Edge.
So what does that moveset lose to? Surf, as a Water move, has pretty good coverage, but obviously it's no help against Grasses and opposing Waters. Stone Edge also has decent coverage, but does nothing to help out the blind sides of Surf. The Darks and Ghosts (well, other than A-Wak, who is weak to Surf AND Edge) all still win, as do Fairies and, yes, the Grasses. So too do the Dragons, Snorlax, and Muk.
With that all in mind, are there better move combos that cover some of those weaknesses without giving up too much? Here are some of the better alternatives to pair with Surf:

• Overheat and Flame Charge give Mew Fire coverage to go along with Water, and combined they hit everything but Dragons and Waters for at least neutral damage, and allow it to hit Grass, Bug, Fire, Rock, Ground, Steel, and Ice for super effective damage. With Surf providing spammy damage, Overheat is the ideal Fire move to pair with it, but the gains are probably not what you would expect. The major Grasses still escape (able to outrace Overheat in even the most favorable-for-Mew circumstances), and Dewgong slips away. The gains ARE there--Clefable and Kanto Muk--but like I said, not the ones you probably expected. Of course, in the real world, outside of sims, having Overheat WILL lead to some toasty Grasses in many games, as we humans don't think like a machine/sim. But this does not reap the immediate rewards you'd like it to... Grass remains an issue, and Waters are much more of a threat as well, resisting both of Mew's charge moves here.
  
• One of Mew's few STAB moves, Psyshock isn't a terrible idea. While you don't want to use it as a replacement for Surf as a spammy move--primarily because it is resisted by Hypno and the Darks that threaten Mew--as a support move alongside Surf, it can do some nice things, like picking up Venusaur, Muk, and Shadow Dragonite. But you again lose Dewgong, plus Articuno and any real shot at the Charmers. You also lack closing power, with both moves capping out at decent but not typically KO type of damage.
  
• Pulling on that same thread, Psychic (the move) isn't a terrible idea. Surf still deals nice cumulative damage to Hypno and Darks, while Psychic provides killing power sufficient to retain Dewgong and Articuno wins. But just as Overheat had an issue coming in time to finish off Grasses, Psychic (the move) has the same issue, and your Venusaurs and Victreebels again escape, basically always unless they don't shield.
  
• There are others that kinda work, but have notable holes. Grass Knot obviously is no help versus Grasses, but it does punish Waters and can also make the A-Grav win easier. Ice Beam operates similarly to Psychic in threatening but usually not outright beating Poisonous Grasses. Wild Charge projects out as one of Mew's better moves, at least on paper, but actually functions not all that differently from Stone Edge and comes with that crippling 2x Defense nerf. This is a very bold statement, I recognize that, but I think I would actually recommend Stone Edge OVER Wild Charge for those reasons, though it is worth noting that Wild Charge is better in the Mew mirror match, at least.
  

And there are others that are okay-ish alongside Surf, like Focus Blast and Flash Cannon, but the others just underperform. Dazzling Gleam provides a nice answer to Darks, but there are only a couple of them and it's a pretty lousy move outside of that... and it usually comes too late to hurt the Darks anyway. Blizzard is a good move but just too slow. Rock Slide is fine but not QUITE as good as Stone Edge in most cases. Non-nerfing Electric moves are okay but don't truly add a lot to Mew's performance that even things like Stone Edge can't do better. And even Hypno and Ghost killer Dark Pulse underforms, needing the opponent to be out of shields or screw up to make an impact, in a manner similar to the extra help Overheat/Ice Beam do versus Grasses.
Still with me? I know this is a lot, sorry... blame Mew! 😅 To sum up where we're at so far, with a good spam/bait move like Surf, the better second charge moves seem to be Overheat, Psychic, and especially Stone Edge, with Grass Knot, Wild Charge, Ice Beam and a couple others showing at least some promise.
So what about the other side of the coin: is there a spam/bait move that works better than Surf? Maaaaaaaaaaaybe....

• Dragon Claw is Mew's fastest move, costing only 35 energy. (Surf costs 40.) Other good news: it has VERY wide neutral coverage, with only Steels and Fairies resisting it, and you can also count the number of relevant Pokémon with one of those typings on one hand (Magneton, A-Slash, Wiggly, Clefable, and maybe A-Tails). Or on one foot, if you prefer, or if you lost a finger to an unfortunate knot tying lesson gone horribly wrong or something. ANYway, it looks superior to Surf with some moves like Overheat, getting Dewgong back (albeit JUST barely) thanks to not being resisted, and Dragonite due to being super effective, but on the downside you give up Shadow Machamp and, damningly, Alolan Marowak. No bueno. Dragon Claw is also decent with Psychic (the move), gaining Dragonite again, but giving up Alolan Graveler to get there. Always an annoying drawback! 😤 And it's more of the same even when paired with Stone Edge: gain Dragonite, lose Machamp, A-Grav, and even Alolan Sandslash (which loses to Surf spam, but resists Dragon Claw and takes only neutral from Edge, so....). Overall, Dragon Claw is certainly viable, especially if you're running low on TMs, but it's a small step down from the coverage Surf provides.
  
• Conversely, a move we already talked about that costs only 5 energy more than Surf is Psyshock. Even on its own, it's a fantastic move for Mew. But being a little slower than Surf and Claw gives it a little less bait/setup potential, and as mentioned before, being resisted by Hypno and Darks is a big downer. And even with it giving Mew a full moveset that is super effective against Haunter and Gengar, it still cannot outrace them. But it DOES have some good things going for it. Paired with Stone Edge, it actually CAN still beat Hypno... if you get the bait. It also overcomes Muk (Kanto, not Alolan) and deals enough damage to beat Dragonite too. (Dragon Claw is now sobbing in a corner somewhere.) But you can no longer outrace Alolan Raichu, and Alolan Marowak again appreciates the lack of Water damage from Surf and walks away, albeit with a severe limp. I will venture to say that Psyshock is ALSO viable, and I might even rank it ahead of Dragon Claw, but definitely a tier below Surf's coverage.
  

And as far as spammy moves go, that uh... that's actually it. There IS Rock Slide also clocking in at only 45 energy, but you don't want to pair it with another Rock move in Stone Edge, so your best potential is probably Overheat or Psychic... viable movesets to be sure, but a slight step below Surf (or even Psyshock) paired with those moves. Ancient Power and Low Sweep are cheap but just BAD moves. And beyond that you're in to moves that cost too much to be considered true bait moves and operate best as closers instead.
So to bring it all home, it looks to me like your best plan of action is thus:

• Move #1 should be something "spammy" (45 energy at the absolute most, and ideally lower) to bait shields or just spam to victory in neutral matchups. Surf, Psyshock, and Dragon Claw all fit in this category, and probably in that order.
  
• Move #2 should be a good closing move, things that cost somewhere in the 50-70 (at MOST) energy range and have typings that provide solid coverage. Your best bets here are Stone Edge, Psychic (the move!), the risky Overheat and Wild Charge, and then viable but unexciting options like Ice Beam, Grass Knot, and Focus Blast.
  

And the fast move... well, I've been talking about Shadow Claw throughout, but never circled back on others. Let's take a peek at the more promising ones real quick:

• Volt Switch, as mentioned a while ago, has the same damage output and energy gain as Shadow Claw, but can be awkward to use since it has a cooldown of two full seconds (compared to Claw's single second). It also has narrower neutral (and even super effective) coverage against the Kanto core meta, being resisted by Grounds, Electrics, Grasses, and Dragons. And this is all borne out in the numbers. Yes, stuff like Lapras obviously gets much easier, but things like Magneton, A-Grav, AhChu, and most alarmingly, A-Wak and Hypno flip the script. Volt Switch is in a pretty good spot in open GBL play, but not in the Kanto Cup meta.
  
• Snarl gives Mew its highest energy gains, but in actual practice, it ends up just missing Shadow Claw's damage output more than anything. Mew IS known for its varied charge moves, but at least down here in Great League level, getting more damage from the fast move is especially important, as not many things (Mew included!) have the bulk to hang in there and deliver more than a couple charges before fainting anyway.
  

Before I conclude and present the results of my analysis, I want to throw a big banner up. Any analysis on Mew in PvP is subject to what I call the "last fish in the pond" scenario. When you're fishing a pond, how do you know when you've caught every fish there is to catch? How do you know when it's time to stop? Answer: you don't. You take things so far before you have to decide to declare your day is done and pack it up. And so it is here. Yes, I am sure there are many, MANY simulated scenarios not in here that would paint a more complete picture. I bet you know of some situations yourself that I didn't cover, of some nuances that sims don't show or that only work in certain circumstances or on certain teams or with certain IVs. I am POSITIVE I have not pulled the last fish--or heck, probably even the last netfull of fish--from the Mew pond. But it's still time to wrap it up. The sun's getting low, with Kanto Cup just a handful of hours away now (yes, even that sheet bend slip knot mangled hand), so I am going to leave things right here and offer some advice based on what I DID fish out of the waters.
So here you go: Your TL;DR follows!

• Shadow Claw is indeed Mew's best fast move. There are cases to be made for things like Volt Switch and Snarl in other metas, but here in Kanto Cup, it's Shadow Claw for its wide neutral coverage, high damage, and ability to shred Hypno (and other Psychic types) and Alolan Marowak. Try very hard to get Claw, and if you can't, you may want to consider letting Mew sit this one out.
  
• Surf seems to be the best overall Move #1, again thanks to coverage and speed, and it with Shadow Claw alone easily takes down Hypno and A-Wak, among others. Psyshock and Dragon Claw are acceptale replacements that function much the same, but know that Hypno and A-Wak will usually escape unless you have a shield and/or energy advantage.
  
• Stone Edge is actually my recommendation for the second charge move (as long as it's paired with a spammy move in that first move slot). The coverage is great in this meta, and it's fast enough to even fire off in multiples in matches that matter (like Hypno, Lapras, Articuno, and others). Other perfectly viable options include Psychic, Overheat, Wild Charge, Ice Beam, Grass Knot, and even Psyshock, roughly in that order. If you're low on TMs and end up rolling one of these, yes, you CAN stop and have a viable Mew.
  

So, what is THE definitive moveset for Mew? Well, there really ISN'T just one. But there are many moves you can "settle" for, and many more that are probably best re-rolled. While I have highlighted my own move recommendations, I certainly won't tell you what to use, as it depends on team composition and what holes you need to fill. Mew can fill a lot of holes, and the fact that it DOES have so many potential "mewves" is its biggest advantage, and you can't really sim that.
A reminder one more time: this is not 100% comprehensive... but it's probably much more comprehensive than anything else out there on Mew, so hopefully this helps! As always, THAT is the #1 goal of me writing these things. And I've written a bunch... my next big PvP article (likely on the December Silph Arena Cup) will officially be #200! 😱
Until then, you can always find me on Twitter for near-daily PvP analysis nuggets, or Patreon. And please, feel free to comment here with your own thoughts or questions and I'll try to get back to you!
Thank you for reading! Best of luck in Kanto Cup, and catch you next time!
P.S. - Just in case you missed it, I do strongly recommend going back and reading Kanto Cup "Nifty Or Thrifty", by comprehensive review of the entire Kanto meta. ✌️

Week 35 of the GQ revamp. Another return to the start of the cycle. Share your set-ups and scores here!
Available: 12/13 - 12/20
Rules: Hollow Killer Damage x5, Strong Attack Damage x2, Ranged Resist.
Enemy Affiliation: Hollow
Bosses: Mashiro (Speed), Hachigen (Power), Shinji (Mind), FH Ichigo (Heart) and Aizen (Tech).
My setup:

• TLA Jushiro
  

  Fortification Pill (30% SP), Missanga (30% SP), and Tenshintai (30% SP). Links being Full STA Damage With lvl 10 SP/FCS/ATK Transcendent levels, 5/5 Special with + 500 SP Bonus Slot.
  

• Bond Jackie
  

  Fortification Pill (30% SP), Missanga (30% SP), and Hollow Bait (30% SP). Links being Full STA Damage With no Transcendence levels.
  

• 5th Anniversary Ichigo
  

  Fortification Pill (30% SP), Missanga (30% SP), and Hollow Bait (30% SP). Links being Full STA Damage With lvl 10 SP Transcendence levels.
  

Managed to score 27,674,159 with the above team.
Recommended Units:

• For SP units: 5th Anniversary Ichigo, 5th Anniversary Byakuya, TYBW Yoruichi, TYBW Yama, Machine Society Ulquiorra, TLA Jushiro, Mugetsu, Bond Jackie (For boost), TYBW Nemu, TYBW Toshiro, etc. just to name a few.
  
• For NAD units: Fierce Battle Ikkaku, Machine Socitey Riruka, CFYOW Yammy, Visored Hiyori, OR other Max Transcended off killer Melee NAD units that can provide some utility to your team. For example, Bond Chad if you need a booster or Belief Kenpachi if you need weaken procs.
  

Key Points:

• Character Choices If possible, you should ALWAYS bring units that match the corresponding killer rule. The killer rule for this game mode is such that units with the corresponding killer have a straight up x5 multiplier instead of the standard killer effect. Without this damage, you typically won’t be able to clear the quest in time.
  
• Status effects Namely Freeze/Paralysis/Weaken are HUGE in this mode in their ability to stop the bosses completely/deal no damage/increase damage output of your team. This gives you much needed breathing room to keep dealing damage and recharge Strong Attacks while also using NAD against the boss instead of running away.
  
• Transcendence This definitely plays a factor in your ability to clear these modes. Especially depending on melee/ranged killer combination some rounds may not be clearable without investment here. Note that recommended units may not be able to clear at base. More investment into Transcendence obviously makes it a lot easier.
  
• Team set-up There are two main team set-ups that can be used to clear these quests. The first being 1 main SP unit that you control and two NAD/Flurry units as the AIs. The NAD units should obviously be chappied up (Gold Chappy/Chappy/Missanga all with 30% ATK) preferably with the Senkgetsu links if you don’t have matching NAD links. As for your main unit you want to run your best SP build (Fortification Pill/Missanga/Tenshintai all with 30% SP) with Senkaizen links or matching Full STA Damage Links. The other main team set-up consists of 3 maxed transcended SP units. Only use this method if you have three maxed units that can fit the ruleset of the week. The goal with this set-up is to outright nuke through the entire quest, and if your units are strong enough you will always clear under 10 seconds. However, in certain rounds where the killer bonus rule is for PvP killers, having a main SP unit might not always be the best, especially if you don't have relevant units. Running three units that match the killer rule, most likely three Flurry NAD units may be the best set-up. Lastly, keep in mind units that have boosts, as they can provide a nice increase to your damage output.
  

Previous Post(s) Covering This Round

• REVAMPED Guild Quests! Week 1 [4/20 - 4/26]
  
• Guild Quests Week 9! [6/14 - 6/21]
  
• Guild Quests Week 17! [8/9 - 8/16]
  
• Guild Quests Week 26! [10/11 - 10/18]
  

"Its DNA is said to contain the genetic codes of all Pokémon, so it can use all kinds of techniques...."
The "Under The Lights" article series provides deeper dives on Pokémon, ones with breakout potential in ongoing PvP formats. My last look at today's featured 'mon was many moons (in a time when GBL was just a twinkle in Hanke's eye, and there had been no such thing as a "move rebalance" yet) and nearly 150 articles ago, but with a format about to hit where it has top tier potential, it is time once again to put Mew, the ultimate Pokémon Swiss army knife, back under the lights.

MEW

Psychic Type
Attack: 121 (119 High Stat Product)
Defense: 120 (122 High Stat Product)
HP: 128 (129 High Stat Product)
(Highest Stat Product IVs: 10-15-13, 1499 CP, Level 16.5)
So first, a caveat to frame everything below: while I still very much want to go back and do a FULL look at Mew across all three leagues at some point, that is a massive undertaking (I don't think anyone has even gone in depth on Mew in ONE league like I did so long ago), and I frankly just don't have the time for that right now. (Maybe when things are hopefully slower in December or January?) For today, I am focusing once again on just Great League, and more specifically on Kanto Cup. Because I have gotten more questions about Mew than anything else for Kanto, and I barely even mentioned Mew in my full budget/meta analysis on Kanto Cup because it IS such an arduous endeavor. I responded to some folks hinting at that and saying that Mew would deserve an entire article in and of itse--wait a minute. Why not just WRITE a feature article on it?
And so here we are.
Anyway, it is obviously the movepool that will be the primary focus of this article, but let's start simply with just the stats for now. Mew is pretty average across the board in terms of Attack, Defense, and HP. That's not a bad thing though. Its Attack and overall bulk are comparable to Swampert and Froslass, for example, and you know how well THEY perform in Great League!
Many of the major Psychic types in Great League come with a secondary typing (Steel, Fighting, Flying, Ground, etc.). So as a reminder, pure Psychics like Mew are inherently weak to Dark, Ghost, and Bug damage, and resist Fighters and opposing Psychics.
Okay, now strap in. We're going to at least list ALL of Mew's currently available moves, and this alone could take a little while. If I've done my math right, there are 312 possible combinations.
Fast move options first, in alphabetical order.
(DPT = Damage Per Turn, EPT = Energy gained Per Turn, CD = Cooldown turns; 1 Turn = 0.5 Seconds)
Fast Moves:

• Charge Beam (Electric, 1.67 DPT, 3.67 EPT, 1.5 CD)
  
• Cut (Normal, 3.0 DPT, 2.0 EPT, 0.5 CD)
  
• Dragon Tail (Dragon, 3.0 DPT, 3.33 EPT, 1.5 CD)
  
• Frost Breath (Ice, 3.5 DPT, 2.5 EPT, 1.0 CD)
  
• Infestation (Bug, 2.0 DPT, 4.0 EPT, 1.5 CD)
  
• Poison Jab (Poison, 3.0 DPT, 3.5 EPT, 1.0 CD)
  
• Pound (Normal, 2.5 DPT, 2.0 EPT, 1.0 CD)
  
• Rock Smash (Fighting, 3.0 DPT, 2.0 EPT, 1.5 CD)
  
• Shadow Claw (Ghost, 3.0 DPT, 4.0 EPT, 1.0 CD)
  
• Snarl (Dark, 1.67 DPT, 4.33 EPT, 1.5 CD)
  
• Steel Wing (Steel, 3.5 DPT, 2.5 EPT, 1.0 CD)
  
• Struggle Bug (Bug, 3.0 DPT, 2.67 EPT, 1.5 CD)
  
• Volt Switch (Electric, 3.0 DPT, 4.0 EPT, 2.0 CD)
  
• Waterfall (Water, 4.0 DPT, 2.67 EPT, 1.5 CD)
  

STILL a who's who of mostly mediocre moves... despite many move shakeups since Mew's release, these are still mostly so-so moves at best, with a few notable exceptions. Let's get this out of the way: Cut, Pound, Rock Smash, and Struggle Bug are all bad, bad moves. 3.0 is considered exactly average for damage output and energy generation for fast moves. If a move is below average in one category, it better be above average in the other or there's really no reason to consider it. And Cut, Pound, Rock Smash, and Struggle Bug all break that mold in the wrong way, having one stat at or below average... and the other stat below average as well. They are all non-starters.
Others with above average damage and below average energy generation (Frost Breath, Steel Wing) or the opposite of higher EPT but below average DPT (Charge Beam) are viable, but unexciting. Personally, I recommend TMing away any of these fast moves for PvP purposes.
And then there are the standouts....

• Snarl was 2.67 DPT/3.67 EPT move way back when, but now it has one of the very highest EPTs in the game (4.33 EPT), representing Mew's highest energy potential and making it an exceptional move. It is a strictly better Charge Beam in a better typing.
  
• Dragon Tail and Poison Jab have above average EPT while maintaining the "average" 3.0 DPT, and both come in typings with good overall coverage.
  
• Waterfall has way above average damage in exchange for dipping just below average in energy generation.
  
• Volt Switch used to be Mew's WORST fast move back in the day, with a putrid line of 2.4 DPT, 2.0 EPT, and a 2.5 second Cooldown. 🤢 But now, it is by far one of its best, with good steady damage and way above average energy gains. But there are two strikes against it. Volt Switch is very slow, with an awkward 2 full seconds for each fast move to complete its cycle and allow you to take further action, which can be very inconvenient when you're rushing to make use of those energy gains and fire off a charge move. And second, it's not the greatest typing, with several common typings (Grass, Ground, Dragon, and opposing Electrics) all resisting it.
  

These moves are all viable, and if you're running out of TMs to the point that you may end up stuck with one of the many poor move options above if you keep TMing, you can stop here. I will at least briefly show what each of these can do for you in Kanto Cup and beyond.
But despite move shakeups over the last year of PvP play, there is still one move you really, REALLY want above all others, regardless of charge move(s) or role you want Mew to fill on your team, and that move is Shadow Claw. It is strictly superior to both Dragon Tail and Poison Jab, matching their damage output and exceeding their energy generation, while also having a lower cooldown than Tail (lower cooldowns making it easier to avoid oveundertapping). On paper, it has the same DPT and EPT as Volt Switch, but half the cooldown, making it far less awkward to race to critical charge moves and/or dip out of battle before the opponent can muster a proper response. Claw is unfortunately resisted by Dark types, and double resisted by Normal types, but it does rip into another Mew nemesis--Ghost types--for super effective damage, as well as the many popular Psychic types (hey there, Hypno!), and has very wide neutral coverage. Even Dragon Tail, with its generally wide neutral coverage, is resisted by a greater number of relevant Pokémon in open GBL, including all the varied Steels (Skarmory, Bastiodon, Jirachi, Steelix, Melmetal, Lucario, Registeel... yeah, it's a pretty big and relevant list) and Fairy types. And in Kanto Cup, while there ARE numerous Normal types, only a very small handful (Snorlax, Wigglytuff, and MAYBE Lickitung) are likely to actually come out and play... and the only viable (and the only eligible!) Darks are Alolans: A-Muk and A-Raticate. So you can quite literally count on one hand the number of meta Pokémon in Kanto Cup that resist Shadow Claw. Out of the 3 DPT and >3 EPT moves, Claw is almost unquestionably the best, and especially in Kanto Cup.
Things are not so clear cut with the charge move(s) of choice, however. There are a slew to choose from:
Charge Moves:

• Ancient Power (Rock, 45 damage, 45 energy, 10% Chance to Raise Attack/Defense +2 Stages)
  
• Blizzard (Ice, 140 damage, 75 energy)
  
• Bulldoze (Ground, 80 damage, 60 energy)
  
• Dark Pulse (Dark, 80 damage, 50 energy)
  
• Dazzling Gleam (Fairy, 110 damage, 70 energy)
  
• Dragon Claw (Dragon, 50 damage, 35 energy)
  
• Energy Ball (Grass, 90 damage, 55 energy)
  
• Flame Charge (Fire, 65 damage, 50 energy, Raises Self Attack +1 Stage)
  
• Flash Cannon (Steel, 110 damage, 70 energy)
  
• Focus Blast (Fighting, 140 damage, 75 energy)
  
• Grass Knot (Grass, 90 damage, 50 energy)
  
• Gyro Ball (Steel, 80 damage, 60 energy)
  
• Hyper Beam (Normal, 150 damage, 80 energy)
  
• Ice Beam (Ice, 90 damage, 55 energy)
  
• Low Sweep (Fighting, 40 damage, 40 energy)
  
• Overheat (Fire, 130 damage, 55 energy, Lowers Self Attack +2 Stages)
  
• Psychic (Psychic, 90 damage, 55 energy, 10% Chance to Lower Opponent Defense -1 Stage)
  
• Psyshock (Psychic, 70 damage, 45 energy)
  
• Rock Slide (Rock, 80 damage, 45 energy)
  
• Solar Beam (Grass, 150 damage, 80 energy)
  
• Stone Edge (Rock, 100 damage, 55 energy)
  
• Surf (Water, 65 damage, 40 energy)
  
• Thunder (Electric, 100 damage, 60 energy)
  
• Thunderbolt (Electric, 90 damage, 55 energy)
  
• Wild Charge (Electric, 100 damage, 45 energy, Lowers Self Defense -2 Stages)
  

A fun fact for those who are seeing a review on Mew for the first time: Mew has no Flying moves. It has at least one move of each type except for that. The more you know....
As we did with the fast moves, let's see if we can eliminate any really poor charge moves and pare down our analysis. First let's pluck out the moves that are the only one of their typing: Surf (for Water), Dazzling Gleam (for Fairy), Bulldoze (for Ground), Dark Pulse (for Dark), and Dragon Claw (for Dragon) are the only charge moves available of their respective typings, so they make the cut... for now.
Big slow moves can be okay, but not if they don't give some kind of distinct advantage. For that reason, I think we can safely eliminate Hyper Beam, which, as a Normal type move, will never offer any real advantage. Solar Beam has the same cost and damage as Hyper Beam, but with a typing that will at least SOMETIMES hit for super effective damage, so it's better... but that being said, there are better, faster moves available in their same typing (Grass Knot and Energy Ball), so Solar Beam doesn't really have a place. Same with Blizzard... Ice Beam is going to be more useful overall if we want Ice damage. And Psyshock makes Psychic (the move) mostly moot, so we'll push Psychic off the raft. Same thing with Thunder and Thunderbolt... Wild Charge is also available and is a better all-around Electric move than both of them, so Thunder and Bolt are out as well.
Similarly, while Flash Cannon could be labeled a big slow move with a faster move of the same typing being available, that other Steel move, Gyro Ball, costs only 5 less energy and deals 30 less damage. Flash Cannon is a much better move overall, so it's in and Gyro Ball is out. I'm also going to eliminate Low Sweep for the same reason. Yes, the other Fighting move Focus Blast is very slow, but Low Sweep is just a terrible, terrible move, with just 40 damage for 40 energy. You're better off using something like Surf or Dragon Claw, even against things weak to Fighting, because they will still both end up dealing more damage for the same (or even a cheaper!) cost.
The final typing to tackle is Rock. There are THREE moves available and you'll notice I have not yet eliminated any of the three. When I wrote the original Mew article, Ancient Power was stil a 70 damage move at the time, so it made the cut... but now, in its humbled state, there's no need for it, so it goes too.
So, that leaves us with Bulldoze, Dark Pulse, Dazzling Gleam, Dragon Claw, Energy Ball, Flame Charge, Flash Cannon, Focus Blast, Grass Knot, Ice Beam, Overheat, Psyshock, Rock Slide, Stone Edge, Surf, and Wild Charge, 16 remaining from the original list of 25. Now comes the heavy number crunching....
One of the main jobs you want to do with Mew is counter Hypno. Mew resists Confusion while dealing super effective damage to Hypno with Shadow Claw, but Claw alone is not enough. What you need to guarantee the win there is a non-resisted move that you can fire off at least twice so that at least one can (hopefully) get through unshielded, AND deal damage sufficient to finish Hypno off. Out of the remaining 16 moves, only Dark Pulse, Dragon Claw, Energy Ball, Grass Knot, Ice Beam, Rock Slide, Stone Edge, and Surf fit both of those criteria. Wild Charge does as well, but each use comes with a very painful debuff, so ideally you're not left with THAT as your only option. Dark Pulse is not suprisingly the most effective, leaving Mew with 2/3 of its HP as the second Pulse kills Hypno immediately. The next closest are Surf and, surprisingly, Stone Edge. Surf is able to be used THREE times, but also has the option to throw only two and pocket energy for the next 'mon up, which costs Mew only 14 HP and leaves it with one Surf charged and a second only 2 more Shadow Claws away. That is some GREAT flexibility. Stone Edge wins by just dishing out BIG neutral damage that leaves Hypno one Claw (actually like 2 HP) from death, with Mew having plenty of life to get that last bit of damage in afterwards. A further surprise: Rock Slide, generally considered a better Rock move overall, falls short.
So let's start there, with Surf and Stone Edge, pitted against the whole Kanto core meta. You can see it gets Mew to over a 50% win rate, which is nice to see. And there are some big names on there, including Lapras and Dewgong, A-Wak and Charizard, Articuno and Zapdos, both Ninetales, both Raichus, Machamp and Poliwrath, Golbat, Beedrill, and Alolan Sandslash. That's a nice list! And it's actually a hair better than that... notice that Hypno is mysteriously listed as a loss. How can that be? Well, obviously it's not... as noted already, Surf AND Stone Edge are each able to take Hypno out, so ignore the awkward timing of this silly sim that flags it as a loss. In this case, just ride ONE of the charge moves to victory. Another hidden win? Alolan Graveler, which the sim shows as a loss by default but, as you can see, Mew can win with Surf alone before A-Grav can reach a killer Stone Edge.
So what does that moveset lose to? Surf, as a Water move, has pretty good coverage, but obviously it's no help against Grasses and opposing Waters. Stone Edge also has decent coverage, but does nothing to help out the blind sides of Surf. The Darks and Ghosts (well, other than A-Wak, who is weak to Surf AND Edge) all still win, as do Fairies and, yes, the Grasses. So too do the Dragons, Snorlax, and Muk.
With that all in mind, are there better move combos that cover some of those weaknesses without giving up too much? Here are some of the better alternatives to pair with Surf:

• Overheat and Flame Charge give Mew Fire coverage to go along with Water, and combined they hit everything but Dragons and Waters for at least neutral damage, and allow it to hit Grass, Bug, Fire, Rock, Ground, Steel, and Ice for super effective damage. With Surf providing spammy damage, Overheat is the ideal Fire move to pair with it, but the gains are probably not what you would expect. The major Grasses still escape (able to outrace Overheat in even the most favorable-for-Mew circumstances), and Dewgong slips away. The gains ARE there--Clefable and Kanto Muk--but like I said, not the ones you probably expected. Of course, in the real world, outside of sims, having Overheat WILL lead to some toasty Grasses in many games, as we humans don't think like a machine/sim. But this does not reap the immediate rewards you'd like it to... Grass remains an issue, and Waters are much more of a threat as well, resisting both of Mew's charge moves here.
  
• One of Mew's few STAB moves, Psyshock isn't a terrible idea. While you don't want to use it as a replacement for Surf as a spammy move--primarily because it is resisted by Hypno and the Darks that threaten Mew--as a support move alongside Surf, it can do some nice things, like picking up Venusaur, Muk, and Shadow Dragonite. But you again lose Dewgong, plus Articuno and any real shot at the Charmers. You also lack closing power, with both moves capping out at decent but not typically KO type of damage.
  
• Pulling on that same thread, Psychic (the move) isn't a terrible idea. Surf still deals nice cumulative damage to Hypno and Darks, while Psychic provides killing power sufficient to retain Dewgong and Articuno wins. But just as Overheat had an issue coming in time to finish off Grasses, Psychic (the move) has the same issue, and your Venusaurs and Victreebels again escape, basically always unless they don't shield.
  
• There are others that kinda work, but have notable holes. Grass Knot obviously is no help versus Grasses, but it does punish Waters and can also make the A-Grav win easier. Ice Beam operates similarly to Psychic in threatening but usually not outright beating Poisonous Grasses. Wild Charge projects out as one of Mew's better moves, at least on paper, but actually functions not all that differently from Stone Edge and comes with that crippling 2x Defense nerf. This is a very bold statement, I recognize that, but I think I would actually recommend Stone Edge OVER Wild Charge for those reasons, though it is worth noting that Wild Charge is better in the Mew mirror match, at least.
  

And there are others that are okay-ish alongside Surf, like Focus Blast and Flash Cannon, but the others just underperform. Dazzling Gleam provides a nice answer to Darks, but there are only a couple of them and it's a pretty lousy move outside of that... and it usually comes too late to hurt the Darks anyway. Blizzard is a good move but just too slow. Rock Slide is fine but not QUITE as good as Stone Edge in most cases. Non-nerfing Electric moves are okay but don't truly add a lot to Mew's performance that even things like Stone Edge can't do better. And even Hypno and Ghost killer Dark Pulse underforms, needing the opponent to be out of shields or screw up to make an impact, in a manner similar to the extra help Overheat/Ice Beam do versus Grasses.
Still with me? I know this is a lot, sorry... blame Mew! 😅 To sum up where we're at so far, with a good spam/bait move like Surf, the better second charge moves seem to be Overheat, Psychic, and especially Stone Edge, with Grass Knot, Wild Charge, Ice Beam and a couple others showing at least some promise.
So what about the other side of the coin: is there a spam/bait move that works better than Surf? Maaaaaaaaaaaybe....

• Dragon Claw is Mew's fastest move, costing only 35 energy. (Surf costs 40.) Other good news: it has VERY wide neutral coverage, with only Steels and Fairies resisting it, and you can also count the number of relevant Pokémon with one of those typings on one hand (Magneton, A-Slash, Wiggly, Clefable, and maybe A-Tails). Or on one foot, if you prefer, or if you lost a finger to an unfortunate knot tying lesson gone horribly wrong or something. ANYway, it looks superior to Surf with some moves like Overheat, getting Dewgong back (albeit JUST barely) thanks to not being resisted, and Dragonite due to being super effective, but on the downside you give up Shadow Machamp and, damningly, Alolan Marowak. No bueno. Dragon Claw is also decent with Psychic (the move), gaining Dragonite again, but giving up Alolan Graveler to get there. Always an annoying drawback! 😤 And it's more of the same even when paired with Stone Edge: gain Dragonite, lose Machamp, A-Grav, and even Alolan Sandslash (which loses to Surf spam, but resists Dragon Claw and takes only neutral from Edge, so....). Overall, Dragon Claw is certainly viable, especially if you're running low on TMs, but it's a small step down from the coverage Surf provides.
  
• Conversely, a move we already talked about that costs only 5 energy more than Surf is Psyshock. Even on its own, it's a fantastic move for Mew. But being a little slower than Surf and Claw gives it a little less bait/setup potential, and as mentioned before, being resisted by Hypno and Darks is a big downer. And even with it giving Mew a full moveset that is super effective against Haunter and Gengar, it still cannot outrace them. But it DOES have some good things going for it. Paired with Stone Edge, it actually CAN still beat Hypno... if you get the bait. It also overcomes Muk (Kanto, not Alolan) and deals enough damage to beat Dragonite too. (Dragon Claw is now sobbing in a corner somewhere.) But you can no longer outrace Alolan Raichu, and Alolan Marowak again appreciates the lack of Water damage from Surf and walks away, albeit with a severe limp. I will venture to say that Psyshock is ALSO viable, and I might even rank it ahead of Dragon Claw, but definitely a tier below Surf's coverage.
  

And as far as spammy moves go, that uh... that's actually it. There IS Rock Slide also clocking in at only 45 energy, but you don't want to pair it with another Rock move in Stone Edge, so your best potential is probably Overheat or Psychic... viable movesets to be sure, but a slight step below Surf (or even Psyshock) paired with those moves. Ancient Power and Low Sweep are cheap but just BAD moves. And beyond that you're in to moves that cost too much to be considered true bait moves and operate best as closers instead.
So to bring it all home, it looks to me like your best plan of action is thus:

• Move #1 should be something "spammy" (45 energy at the absolute most, and ideally lower) to bait shields or just spam to victory in neutral matchups. Surf, Psyshock, and Dragon Claw all fit in this category, and probably in that order.
  
• Move #2 should be a good closing move, things that cost somewhere in the 50-70 (at MOST) energy range and have typings that provide solid coverage. Your best bets here are Stone Edge, Psychic (the move!), the risky Overheat and Wild Charge, and then viable but unexciting options like Ice Beam, Grass Knot, and Focus Blast.
  

And the fast move... well, I've been talking about Shadow Claw throughout, but never circled back on others. Let's take a peek at the more promising ones real quick:

• Volt Switch, as mentioned a while ago, has the same damage output and energy gain as Shadow Claw, but can be awkward to use since it has a cooldown of two full seconds (compared to Claw's single second). It also has narrower neutral (and even super effective) coverage against the Kanto core meta, being resisted by Grounds, Electrics, Grasses, and Dragons. And this is all borne out in the numbers. Yes, stuff like Lapras obviously gets much easier, but things like Magneton, A-Grav, AhChu, and most alarmingly, A-Wak and Hypno flip the script. Volt Switch is in a pretty good spot in open GBL play, but not in the Kanto Cup meta.
  
• Snarl gives Mew its highest energy gains, but in actual practice, it ends up just missing Shadow Claw's damage output more than anything. Mew IS known for its varied charge moves, but at least down here in Great League level, getting more damage from the fast move is especially important, as not many things (Mew included!) have the bulk to hang in there and deliver more than a couple charges before fainting anyway.
  

Before I conclude and present the results of my analysis, I want to throw a big banner up. Any analysis on Mew in PvP is subject to what I call the "last fish in the pond" scenario. When you're fishing a pond, how do you know when you've caught every fish there is to catch? How do you know when it's time to stop? Answer: you don't. You take things so far before you have to decide to declare your day is done and pack it up. And so it is here. Yes, I am sure there are many, MANY simulated scenarios not in here that would paint a more complete picture. I bet you know of some situations yourself that I didn't cover, of some nuances that sims don't show or that only work in certain circumstances or on certain teams or with certain IVs. I am POSITIVE I have not pulled the last fish--or heck, probably even the last netfull of fish--from the Mew pond. But it's still time to wrap it up. The sun's getting low, with Kanto Cup just a handful of hours away now (yes, even that sheet bend slip knot mangled hand), so I am going to leave things right here and offer some advice based on what I DID fish out of the waters.
So here you go: Your TL;DR follows!

• Shadow Claw is indeed Mew's best fast move. There are cases to be made for things like Volt Switch and Snarl in other metas, but here in Kanto Cup, it's Shadow Claw for its wide neutral coverage, high damage, and ability to shred Hypno (and other Psychic types) and Alolan Marowak. Try very hard to get Claw, and if you can't, you may want to consider letting Mew sit this one out.
  
• Surf seems to be the best overall Move #1, again thanks to coverage and speed, and it with Shadow Claw alone easily takes down Hypno and A-Wak, among others. Psyshock and Dragon Claw are acceptale replacements that function much the same, but know that Hypno and A-Wak will usually escape unless you have a shield and/or energy advantage.
  
• Stone Edge is actually my recommendation for the second charge move (as long as it's paired with a spammy move in that first move slot). The coverage is great in this meta, and it's fast enough to even fire off in multiples in matches that matter (like Hypno, Lapras, Articuno, and others). Other perfectly viable options include Psychic, Overheat, Wild Charge, Ice Beam, Grass Knot, and even Psyshock, roughly in that order. If you're low on TMs and end up rolling one of these, yes, you CAN stop and have a viable Mew.
  

So, what is THE definitive moveset for Mew? Well, there really ISN'T just one. But there are many moves you can "settle" for, and many more that are probably best re-rolled. While I have highlighted my own move recommendations, I certainly won't tell you what to use, as it depends on team composition and what holes you need to fill. Mew can fill a lot of holes, and the fact that it DOES have so many potential "mewves" is its biggest advantage, and you can't really sim that.
A reminder one more time: this is not 100% comprehensive... but it's probably much more comprehensive than anything else out there on Mew, so hopefully this helps! As always, THAT is the #1 goal of me writing these things. And I've written a bunch... my next big PvP article (likely on The Arena subreddit for the December Silph Cup) will officially be #200! 😱
Until then, you can always find me on Twitter for near-daily PvP analysis nuggets, or Patreon. And please, feel free to comment here with your own thoughts or questions and I'll try to get back to you!
Thank you for reading! Best of luck in Kanto Cup, and catch you next time!
P.S. - Just in case you missed it, I do strongly recommend going back and reading Kanto Cup "Nifty Or Thrifty", by comprehensive review of the entire Kanto meta. ✌️